We've all experienced times of conflict and personal struggle. Times when the assistance and advice of a friend always seemed to lend comfort and ease the burden. Have you ever wondered what it would be like if that friend was one of the world's most revered astrologers, with over 25 years of experience?
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I have decided to put more time and energy into my research. It’s been a pleasure to answer your emails and to help you through some of life’s tough journeys. Everyone who has participated in my Dear Eugenia column has enriched my life and I hope I have improved yours as well.
For those of you who wish to contribute birth data to my research, please enter your information to my medical astrology research listed on my home page. This research is explicitly dealing with cancer and mental health – addiction illness. The focus is on early diagnosis and preventative medicine.
I want to stress how important it is to submit complete and accurate birth data – the time and place of birth.
The following are our 'Dear Eugenia' letters archive:
Dear Eugenia,
I'm am so lost in knowing what love is I'm always making the wrong choices where love is concerned I was born June 26, 1959, at 10:26 PM. I'm in my second marriage and we constantly fight all the time. I got married 6yrs ago after I lost my son who was murdered. I still have such a void and it's still painful to bear. I got married a year later in 1994 on my son's birthday. I thought this guy was the one but I found out things about his life style that bothers me. He was so wrong to hide such a thing from me. I still believe he is hiding more than he has already let out of the closet. He is a Capricorn born Jan 19th 1960.I cannot deal with his lifestyle. He says he is not gay he just likes to wear women's clothes. Back in May of this year I left him because I feel like such a fool to have trusted him. I believed he loved me and now I'm sorry that I was so vulnerable. In 93 when I lost my boy and I was looking for love and comfort I made a huge bad choice. I'm still married to him but things are not right anymore. I care about him because he took care of my daughter and I when I needed someone, but we fight constantly over him wearing women's clothes. I did not get married for this reason. I am so hurt by all this and have been trying to keep it together but I'm emotionally tired. I've been deceived, lied to and hurt. Yes I'm a big fool for getting married after I lost my son. Now I don't know what real love is, who to trust, or what to do. I'm getting so withdrawn my family says you made a vow before GOD when you got married so honor it. Yes I did and had I of known this before I would not be married to him. Please help I don't know what to do.
There is this guy who likes me at work and I told him to get away from me I didn't mean to hurt him he was born February 1st Aquarius man. He knows I'm married and I believe he wants to be more then friends. He is so shy kind and he make me happy to be around him but I didn't tell him that most of the time when he is near me I tremble. I can feel how his heart beats or when something is bothering him I'd love to be friends but its too hard right now. I don't trust to many people right now and I don't want to hurt anyone. Sorry this is so long. I just don't know what to do or who to believe and most of all it hurts not being able to be friends with this guy at work. It has to be this way. He has three wonderful kids but I'm sorry to not be able to help him with advice or anything because I have enough to deal with myself. Can you tell me if the man I'm married to is withholding more secrets I would be appreciative. I'm so afraid to try again but then again I'm married forever so what difference does it make. If Mr. right is still out there he's gonna pass me by. Do you have any help for me?
Desperately Lost
Dear Desperately Lost
The comparison with your husband is not bad. Yes there is some deception in an area regarding his and your beliefs and ethics but that doesn't mean that it can't work. You need to be supportive, talk to him about the way you feel and ask him to go to counseling with you. Regarding your friend at work, you did not mention his year of birth making it difficult for me to assess your comparison however he does fall in an area of your chart that deals with work, secret affairs and probable difficulties that could easily result in you losing your job. I would be extremely careful with your Aquarius friend. If you become intimate with him while you are both still in your present marriages you are never going to be able to trust one another in the future. For now you should be putting more effort into making your marriage work and less into worrying about the man at work.
Eugenia
Dear Eugenia,
I know I've met my soul mate, but we keep having conflicts that end with me not wanting to deal with him. He's a Taurus born May 4, 1971 and I'm a Cancer born June 25, 1962. Nine months ago he came back into my life after a 5-year separation, and I believed he wanted a second chance and that he truly loved me. His actions say otherwise when it comes to my feelings. I've gone out of my way, once again, to make sure he is happy, comfortable, and to give all the support he needs. He's done nothing for me and he makes me feel that he has taken advantage of me again and only cares about himself.
I've just recently asked him to leave, because he had hurt my feelings again and that was the last straw for me. I miss him desperately, but I don't know if it's my self-destructive behavior that won't completely let go! I don't want to go through this back and forth emotional roller coaster with him forever. Am I lying to myself? My Cancer logic is slipping away...
Destined
Dear Destined
The comparison does lack some qualities that I would like to see and deception and disillusionment are present in areas of your chart that deal with the home and chores that you share with one another. The unfortunate thing is that once you do too much for someone it is hard to back off and stop doing without causing problems in the relationship. This person is taking advantage of you but you have allowed it to happen. Your chart indicates that you do have problems when it comes to relationships. Your natal Saturn opposite your natal Venus both adversely aspected by your natal Neptune can make it difficult for you to choose properly. It is important for you to have an astrological comparison done before you give your heart to someone. You are in a high cycle for romance right now and will also be during the first half of next year. It is important for you to move on and free yourself of this man who has little to offer you but grief. Keep in mind that as long as he is in your life it will be difficult to take advantage of the opportunities you have for meeting someone new. You match up well to those born under the signs Aries, Gemini, Libra, Sagittarius and Aquarius.
Eugenia
Dear Eugenia,
I hope very much that you can help me. I was born on 26 December 1963 at 3.35 AM and my ex-boyfriend was born 10 January 1967. We have been together for four or so years and he has just told me that we are finished. He has always been a 'closed book' as far as feelings go or showing them at least. He told me that while he misses me and 90% of the time he is happy with me, there are certain characteristics of mine that he cannot stand. The main being, and I admit this - I tend to overindulge in alcohol on occasions. He feels that I have a problem with this and will not tolerate it any longer.
We don't live together and I have always felt that I was the one giving a lot more than him. We live in a small country town where gossip is rife and unfortunately a lot of people have nothing more to do than embellish.My childhood was odd and I have recently lost my brother and I feel that these things influence my behavior at times.
I asked him if I had lost him forever and he replied that we both had a lot of thinking do.
Please help me. I am so lost and sad and while I believe in taking responsibility for my actions - is there any chance for us?
EllyMM
Dear EllyMM
Your comparison was certainly good enough to make it work however I worry that too much has happened for him to turn back. Your chart indicates that you are and have been going through a period of over indulgence that does need to be stopped. I believe that he is truly concerned for you and just can't take how you react when under the influence. It's time to pull your act together and hope that it's not too late to win him back. You do have a transit moving through your chart until the Spring of next year that indicates that people from your past are likely to come back into your life but you will have to work hard for it to be him. He will be experiencing a similar transit so the possibility if you take all the right steps is present. I suggest that you stop indulging all together in order to save yourself a lot of grief in the future.
Eugenia
