We've all experienced times of conflict and personal struggle. Times when the assistance and advice of a friend always seemed to lend comfort and ease the burden. Have you ever wondered what it would be like if that friend was one of the world's most revered astrologers, with over 25 years of experience?
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I have decided to put more time and energy into my research. It’s been a pleasure to answer your emails and to help you through some of life’s tough journeys. Everyone who has participated in my Dear Eugenia column has enriched my life and I hope I have improved yours as well.
For those of you who wish to contribute birth data to my research, please enter your information to my medical astrology research listed on my home page. This research is explicitly dealing with cancer and mental health – addiction illness. The focus is on early diagnosis and preventative medicine.
I want to stress how important it is to submit complete and accurate birth data – the time and place of birth.
The following are our 'Dear Eugenia' letters archive:
Dear Eugenia,
I'm am so lost in knowing what love is I'm always making the wrong choices where love is concerned I was born June 26, 1959, at 10:26 PM. I'm in my second marriage and we constantly fight all the time. I got married 6yrs ago after I lost my son who was murdered. I still have such a void and it's still painful to bear. I got married a year later in 1994 on my son's birthday. I thought this guy was the one but I found out things about his life style that bothers me. He was so wrong to hide such a thing from me. I still believe he is hiding more than he has already let out of the closet. He is a Capricorn born Jan 19th 1960.I cannot deal with his lifestyle. He says he is not gay he just likes to wear women's clothes. Back in May of this year I left him because I feel like such a fool to have trusted him. I believed he loved me and now I'm sorry that I was so vulnerable. In 93 when I lost my boy and I was looking for love and comfort I made a huge bad choice. I'm still married to him but things are not right anymore. I care about him because he took care of my daughter and I when I needed someone, but we fight constantly over him wearing women's clothes. I did not get married for this reason. I am so hurt by all this and have been trying to keep it together but I'm emotionally tired. I've been deceived, lied to and hurt. Yes I'm a big fool for getting married after I lost my son. Now I don't know what real love is, who to trust, or what to do. I'm getting so withdrawn my family says you made a vow before GOD when you got married so honor it. Yes I did and had I of known this before I would not be married to him. Please help I don't know what to do.
There is this guy who likes me at work and I told him to get away from me I didn't mean to hurt him he was born February 1st Aquarius man. He knows I'm married and I believe he wants to be more then friends. He is so shy kind and he make me happy to be around him but I didn't tell him that most of the time when he is near me I tremble. I can feel how his heart beats or when something is bothering him I'd love to be friends but its too hard right now. I don't trust to many people right now and I don't want to hurt anyone. Sorry this is so long. I just don't know what to do or who to believe and most of all it hurts not being able to be friends with this guy at work. It has to be this way. He has three wonderful kids but I'm sorry to not be able to help him with advice or anything because I have enough to deal with myself. Can you tell me if the man I'm married to is withholding more secrets I would be appreciative. I'm so afraid to try again but then again I'm married forever so what difference does it make. If Mr. right is still out there he's gonna pass me by. Do you have any help for me?
Desperately Lost
Dear Desperately Lost
The comparison with your husband is not bad. Yes there is some deception in an area regarding his and your beliefs and ethics but that doesn't mean that it can't work. You need to be supportive, talk to him about the way you feel and ask him to go to counseling with you. Regarding your friend at work, you did not mention his year of birth making it difficult for me to assess your comparison however he does fall in an area of your chart that deals with work, secret affairs and probable difficulties that could easily result in you losing your job. I would be extremely careful with your Aquarius friend. If you become intimate with him while you are both still in your present marriages you are never going to be able to trust one another in the future. For now you should be putting more effort into making your marriage work and less into worrying about the man at work.
Eugenia
Dear Eugenia,
I have read some of your responses to the letters posted in your new advice feature, and I'm impressed with your knowledgeable and common sense advice. I am wondering if you can help me, as well. I am a professional Leo woman, who was born on July 25, 1962, 11:46pm. I have recently moved back to my home state for two reasons: I have just gotten a great job with a software company here and I am also looking for a fresh new start as I have just gotten a divorce from my ex-husband, born August 25, 1953, 5:55am. My marriage was never really great to begin with, but had gotten especially bad during the last two years, as my ex-husband became increasingly more and more verbally and mentally abusive. I left him when he started becoming physically abusive towards me and threatened my life. After I left him, I spent the next year and a half-alone trying to re-build my life and heal from my emotional wounds. I realized through therapy and self-examination that most of my relationships with men in the past have been emotionally destructive. Now that I am getting settled in my new home and job and am starting to feel better about myself, I want to start dating again. Just recently I've met a nice man through a friend and he and I just started seeing each other. He and I seem to get along well and have a lot in common; also my friend tells me that he is a genuinely nice guy. What worries me is that this man is a Virgo, like my ex-husband. I've noticed in my self-analysis that although I'm a Leo, most of my long-lasting relationships have been with Virgo men. This new man's birth data is Sept. 20, 1960 (birth time unknown). Is this new relationship destined to become destructive and emotionally unfulfilling like my marriage and past relationships were, or can I finally let the past go and look forward to new love, new life, and much better things in my future?
Wounded yet Hopeful Lioness
Dear Wounded yet Hopeful Lioness
A person's chart is as individualistic as a finger print. Your ex husband is really quite different from your new man and so is your comparison with both. You really matched up very poorly to your ex and I'm not surprised that it didn't last. Your ex only has his natal Sun in the sign Virgo and the rest of the planets in his chart are spread out between the signs Gemini, Cancer, Leo, Libra and Pisces. Your new man on the other hand has his natal Sun, Moon and Pluto in the sign Virgo with some planets falling in the signs Gemini, Leo, Libra, Scorpio, Sagittarius and Capricorn. Your chart indicates that you do have a problem where relationships are concerned and that you are prone to picking poorly or for the wrong reason. You do match up far better to your new Virgo and I do believe that you can enjoy an honest and open relationship with him. You will be in an exceptionally high cycle for love during the later half of next year and the first half of the year 2002. This can mean that this relationship will develop into something very strong or you will meet someone new who will capture your heart. Please get a comparison done if you do decide to date someone new to ensure that you aren't picking the wrong partner.
Eugenia
Dear Eugenia,
I really enjoy your column and find your replies eloquent and very interesting. I've written in before, and haven't gotten a response, so I figured I'd try again. I am in a strange situation right now. I've had an eating disorder for the past 3 years of my life, and just recently, got put into the hospital due to complications from the severity of it. I know what I'm doing is wrong, and I'm trying to change, but it seems like every attempt is half-hearted at best. I've read in several different books that individuals born on my DOB (March 9, 1985, @ 1:45AM) show a pattern of substance abuse and health problems. The year just seems to be getting worse and worse and I was wondering what my chart holds for the upcoming school year. I think I put up a front and have a difficult time letting others get close, in fear that I will somehow lose control of everything in my life. Will my life and relationships with others improve at all? Thank you for your time.
Pisces
Dear Pisces
You aren't a very strong Pisces only having your natal Sun in that sign. Your chart is predominantly Aries with your natal Mercury, Venus and Mars in that sign and Scorpio with your natal Saturn and Pluto in that sign. Your recent jaunt to the hospital does show up and it appears that if you don't use your Scorpio discipline to get back on track that you will end up in hospital again over the course of the next year. I urge you to take your health concerns seriously and stabilize your mental outlook before you start to worry about relationships. You have to learn to love yourself first. Your chart indicates that you have so much to work with but with your natal Neptune adversely aspecting your natal Mercury it is apparent that you are not always honest with yourself and this can lead to problems dealing with denial etc. However with your natal Mercury favorably positioned to your natal Jupiter it should help you to feel better about yourself. Problems with home, family or friends may occur if you don't take better care of yourself. It is obvious that you have people around you who care and who may be getting annoyed with the way you are handling your life. You are bright, creative and could help others with similar problems. You will probably be more attracted to people or partners who are older or younger and possibly at this stage of your life you aren't really meeting a wide enough variety of people. It is important for you to get focused and to keep active as well as to get your eating disorder sorted out once and for all. You are the master of your own destiny and no one else can make the adjustments for you. I believe that you have what it takes to change your life but the most difficult part is taking the first step. If you don't get started your educational pursuits will suffer over the course of the next couple of years, however if you can manage to pull things together you have the potential to do quite well. You should be meeting people over the next year that are good for you as well as those who can help you make the necessary life changes. You match up well to those born under the signs Aries, Gemini, Virgo, Scorpio and Pisces.
Eugenia
