We've all experienced times of conflict and personal struggle. Times when the assistance and advice of a friend always seemed to lend comfort and ease the burden. Have you ever wondered what it would be like if that friend was one of the world's most revered astrologers, with over 25 years of experience?
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I have decided to put more time and energy into my research. It’s been a pleasure to answer your emails and to help you through some of life’s tough journeys. Everyone who has participated in my Dear Eugenia column has enriched my life and I hope I have improved yours as well.
For those of you who wish to contribute birth data to my research, please enter your information to my medical astrology research listed on my home page. This research is explicitly dealing with cancer and mental health – addiction illness. The focus is on early diagnosis and preventative medicine.
I want to stress how important it is to submit complete and accurate birth data – the time and place of birth.
The following are our 'Dear Eugenia' letters archive:
Dear Eugenia,
I'm am so lost in knowing what love is I'm always making the wrong choices where love is concerned I was born June 26, 1959, at 10:26 PM. I'm in my second marriage and we constantly fight all the time. I got married 6yrs ago after I lost my son who was murdered. I still have such a void and it's still painful to bear. I got married a year later in 1994 on my son's birthday. I thought this guy was the one but I found out things about his life style that bothers me. He was so wrong to hide such a thing from me. I still believe he is hiding more than he has already let out of the closet. He is a Capricorn born Jan 19th 1960.I cannot deal with his lifestyle. He says he is not gay he just likes to wear women's clothes. Back in May of this year I left him because I feel like such a fool to have trusted him. I believed he loved me and now I'm sorry that I was so vulnerable. In 93 when I lost my boy and I was looking for love and comfort I made a huge bad choice. I'm still married to him but things are not right anymore. I care about him because he took care of my daughter and I when I needed someone, but we fight constantly over him wearing women's clothes. I did not get married for this reason. I am so hurt by all this and have been trying to keep it together but I'm emotionally tired. I've been deceived, lied to and hurt. Yes I'm a big fool for getting married after I lost my son. Now I don't know what real love is, who to trust, or what to do. I'm getting so withdrawn my family says you made a vow before GOD when you got married so honor it. Yes I did and had I of known this before I would not be married to him. Please help I don't know what to do.
There is this guy who likes me at work and I told him to get away from me I didn't mean to hurt him he was born February 1st Aquarius man. He knows I'm married and I believe he wants to be more then friends. He is so shy kind and he make me happy to be around him but I didn't tell him that most of the time when he is near me I tremble. I can feel how his heart beats or when something is bothering him I'd love to be friends but its too hard right now. I don't trust to many people right now and I don't want to hurt anyone. Sorry this is so long. I just don't know what to do or who to believe and most of all it hurts not being able to be friends with this guy at work. It has to be this way. He has three wonderful kids but I'm sorry to not be able to help him with advice or anything because I have enough to deal with myself. Can you tell me if the man I'm married to is withholding more secrets I would be appreciative. I'm so afraid to try again but then again I'm married forever so what difference does it make. If Mr. right is still out there he's gonna pass me by. Do you have any help for me?
Desperately Lost
Dear Desperately Lost
The comparison with your husband is not bad. Yes there is some deception in an area regarding his and your beliefs and ethics but that doesn't mean that it can't work. You need to be supportive, talk to him about the way you feel and ask him to go to counseling with you. Regarding your friend at work, you did not mention his year of birth making it difficult for me to assess your comparison however he does fall in an area of your chart that deals with work, secret affairs and probable difficulties that could easily result in you losing your job. I would be extremely careful with your Aquarius friend. If you become intimate with him while you are both still in your present marriages you are never going to be able to trust one another in the future. For now you should be putting more effort into making your marriage work and less into worrying about the man at work.
Eugenia
Dear Eugenia,
I am very much in love and hoping to marry a Leo, (8/11/55) that I have known for 6 years now. We dated for three years, took one and a half years off, and are back together in a stronger, more passionate bond than ever before. He is a very affectionate man, and I feel in many ways my perfect match and soul mate. When I'm with him I'm ecstatic and the separations are still torture.We have had a long distance relationship for the last year, as was the case early on as well, but at that point neither of us was ready (or able) to move.
Recently I've been considering moving across the country to be with this man. He has said repeatedly that he wants to live with me though he is not sure about "marriage" per se. Perhaps it was his Leo nature --he loves women and says so-- but he was not monogamous with me in our first three years together, a fact I learned only this year. Now I have less trust in him, though I still love him desperately. I want to marry this man, even though he hurt me.
Is this man capable of loving only one woman? Unfortunately I do not have a birth time for him. I am concerned that if I move my life to be with him, I might get hurt, since I was shocked to learn that my prince was not who I thought he was in Round one. He has stated it was only a "phase" and he is serious about me now. If you can give me any insights into our future based on his and my chart, I would appreciate it. I was born February 11, 1974, at 3:30 AM. Thanks Eugenia,
Polar Opposites
Dear Polar Opposites
The comparison between you and your Leo partner was certainly enticing, engaging and intriguing however it also showed signs of sorrow, deception and disillusionment. Now I'm not trying to deter you from following your heart because I feel you are going to do so anyway and that you probably have to experience this relationship for some karmic reason. I must however tell you that your Leo falls in an area of your chart that deals with dead end projects and that the length of time spent with one another may not be all that long. He is going through many changes. He doesn't really know what he wants and will bounce back and forth between wanting to be single and wanting to be married. If you make the effort to move and he still isn't willing to marry you should be asking yourself why not. You were born with your natal Neptune adversely aspecting your natal Mercury and this usually represents a person who is gullible, easily deceived or blind to the defects of others. Before you make a move I suggest that you have a job to go to first. Look out for your own interests and be sure that regardless of what he does you are self-sufficient.
Eugenia
Dear Eugenia
I am really confused. I dislike my dad's partner - Unfortunately intensely. This started shortly after he met her 2 years after he and Mum separated, now 8 years ago, when I was 10. Until recently she treated me considerately, but I continued to dislike her. Now she has openly shown an aggressive dislike of me. I am now older and have decided to write down my dislikes of her. Today she refused to cooperate with this saying do what you like I am not interested. I live with her, my dad and their son, Giles, my brother. Dad is miserable and I don't want to split them up (as threatened by her) but I can't change the way I feel fundamentally. Any suggestions? I was born June 2, 1988 at 3:30 PM.
Gemini Son
Dear Eugenia
Do you give advice to men in distress? I should wait for your reply, but I am in need of immediate advice. I am 55, born February 23, 1951 at 9:30 AM and I have an 18 old son, a 35 year old partner and our son of 6. Eldest son and partner don't get on. After years of aggression by him, eldest son attempted to ameliorate situation by beginning to be civil to her, but too late it seems. Now his attempts, clumsy though they may be are rebuffed by her. I think she is being unreasonable, but I appreciate she is very hurt. I am piggy in the middle, as usual. Not the first time (third marriage/relationship). Help!!!
Distressed Father
Dear Gemini Son and Distressed Father
I tired to email both of you to find out when your stepmother/partner was born considering she is the main issue but your emails bounced back to me therefore I am combining your emails and looking at your charts to see if I can help.
As a father you should have nipped that nastiness that your son continually shoved in your partners face a long time ago. He may not have liked her but that didn't mean that he had to abuse her and at the same time hurt you. Your son is vocal and can be unpredictable and act in haste saying things that are hurtful. He is intelligent, charming and knows how to manipulate situations which is precisely what he has done, and you have let him. As a Pisces father and partner you have been too soft trying to preserve peace with both your wife and your son. This has probably made you appear weak in the eyes of your partner causing her to lose respect and at this point probably not really caring all that much if both you and your son leave. Without her chart it is impossible for me to tell you exactly where she is at or how strong your astrological comparison is however you can check that out yourself if you go to my www.astroadvice.com web site and run a compatibility test. If you measure up to 70% or higher you probably have a chance to turn things around.
I fear however that with the onslaught of transiting Saturn moving in to oppose your Pisces planets you are about to face some limitations that could easily lead to another failed marriage. If your partner is a Sagittarius or Capricorn I imagine she has had enough and is heading out the door. You may want to consider doing some very fast-talking and decision making if you want to give a last attempt at rectifying this problem.
With the cooperation of your Gemini son who has not been a stellar addition to the family you may pull this off. He may be trying to make amends but short of him moving out it may not be enough. Being 18 now he should be close to pursuing higher education so possibly he can go away for his next level of schooling. It is obvious that he is smart and that he should be continuing his education so please consider this as it is probably the best option if you want to make you marriage work. If your son doesn't want to move out or go away to school remind him that he owes you and your partner for putting up with all the crap he has dished out the past ten years. After all who the heck was running the show at home
