We've all experienced times of conflict and personal struggle. Times when the assistance and advice of a friend always seemed to lend comfort and ease the burden. Have you ever wondered what it would be like if that friend was one of the world's most revered astrologers, with over 25 years of experience?
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I have decided to put more time and energy into my research. It’s been a pleasure to answer your emails and to help you through some of life’s tough journeys. Everyone who has participated in my Dear Eugenia column has enriched my life and I hope I have improved yours as well.
For those of you who wish to contribute birth data to my research, please enter your information to my medical astrology research listed on my home page. This research is explicitly dealing with cancer and mental health – addiction illness. The focus is on early diagnosis and preventative medicine.
I want to stress how important it is to submit complete and accurate birth data – the time and place of birth.
The following are our 'Dear Eugenia' letters archive:
Dear Eugenia,
I'm am so lost in knowing what love is I'm always making the wrong choices where love is concerned I was born June 26, 1959, at 10:26 PM. I'm in my second marriage and we constantly fight all the time. I got married 6yrs ago after I lost my son who was murdered. I still have such a void and it's still painful to bear. I got married a year later in 1994 on my son's birthday. I thought this guy was the one but I found out things about his life style that bothers me. He was so wrong to hide such a thing from me. I still believe he is hiding more than he has already let out of the closet. He is a Capricorn born Jan 19th 1960.I cannot deal with his lifestyle. He says he is not gay he just likes to wear women's clothes. Back in May of this year I left him because I feel like such a fool to have trusted him. I believed he loved me and now I'm sorry that I was so vulnerable. In 93 when I lost my boy and I was looking for love and comfort I made a huge bad choice. I'm still married to him but things are not right anymore. I care about him because he took care of my daughter and I when I needed someone, but we fight constantly over him wearing women's clothes. I did not get married for this reason. I am so hurt by all this and have been trying to keep it together but I'm emotionally tired. I've been deceived, lied to and hurt. Yes I'm a big fool for getting married after I lost my son. Now I don't know what real love is, who to trust, or what to do. I'm getting so withdrawn my family says you made a vow before GOD when you got married so honor it. Yes I did and had I of known this before I would not be married to him. Please help I don't know what to do.
There is this guy who likes me at work and I told him to get away from me I didn't mean to hurt him he was born February 1st Aquarius man. He knows I'm married and I believe he wants to be more then friends. He is so shy kind and he make me happy to be around him but I didn't tell him that most of the time when he is near me I tremble. I can feel how his heart beats or when something is bothering him I'd love to be friends but its too hard right now. I don't trust to many people right now and I don't want to hurt anyone. Sorry this is so long. I just don't know what to do or who to believe and most of all it hurts not being able to be friends with this guy at work. It has to be this way. He has three wonderful kids but I'm sorry to not be able to help him with advice or anything because I have enough to deal with myself. Can you tell me if the man I'm married to is withholding more secrets I would be appreciative. I'm so afraid to try again but then again I'm married forever so what difference does it make. If Mr. right is still out there he's gonna pass me by. Do you have any help for me?
Desperately Lost
Dear Desperately Lost
The comparison with your husband is not bad. Yes there is some deception in an area regarding his and your beliefs and ethics but that doesn't mean that it can't work. You need to be supportive, talk to him about the way you feel and ask him to go to counseling with you. Regarding your friend at work, you did not mention his year of birth making it difficult for me to assess your comparison however he does fall in an area of your chart that deals with work, secret affairs and probable difficulties that could easily result in you losing your job. I would be extremely careful with your Aquarius friend. If you become intimate with him while you are both still in your present marriages you are never going to be able to trust one another in the future. For now you should be putting more effort into making your marriage work and less into worrying about the man at work.
Eugenia
Dear Eugenia,
I feel so frustrated and unhappy at times. Nearly 5 years ago I moved to another province with my partner (March 13, 1951) so that we could be near his kids. We thought it was for the best; one of the children was having problems and it made sense to be closer. But problems with his ex-wife have never gone away and it's just never improved here. We don't get to see the kids and it's been at times a nightmare dealing with his ex. On top of that, we have had financial difficulties almost from the beginning. I couldn't find full time work for ages and he found work, was laid off and has been trying to do contracting since. I finally found work that I like but I am still not very happy. My partner gets work sporadically and we are just not doing well financially. I get frustrated with him and frustrated with this situation. Plenty of times I think about leaving. My head says go home, my heart says stay here. I don't feel that this is the right place for me. It seems a waste of time since we rarely see his kids anyway. My biggest concern is finding work; his is losing the kids even more. But I still feel the burning desire to move home. Do you see me (or us together) leaving here and returning home or moving someplace else? What is our financial outlook for the next year? I was born September 12, 1961 at 10:44 am. Thanks for listening.
Virgo/Pisces
Dear Virgo/Pisces
Without your husbands time of birth it is difficult to know what he will do. He is facing some changes and I do believe that emotionally he will be getting his life together over the course of the next year while he benefits from a Saturn transit that is moving through his chart. On the other hand he may also be questioning his personal direction as well. Once he has come to some decisions regarding his ex and his children he should be able to make a move. I believe that will begin to make more sense to him in August of this year. Your comparison was good but there are signs of emotional deception which means you probably aren?t communicating with one another the way you should be right now. It is time for both of you to talk openly and honestly about what you really want to see happen in the future. Your chart does indicate that you should stick it out together but also that it would be better for you to make a move back to where you have the support of friends and family. Once again without your husbands time of birth I can not tell whether he should make the move or if he will.
Eugenia
Dear Eugenia,
I have two babies, a 36-month-old boy and a 20-month old girl. Their father has been an addiction of mine for four years. Just when I think I have finally made it to a place in my life where I can let go of him; I am pregnant again. I am torn between continuing in this one-sided relationship for the sake of our children, who adore him, while having another baby; or not; and disconnecting from him completely. I was born 7/6/65 at 5:30 EST and he was born 1/20/63 at 8:30p.m. PST. I fear that if I don?t walk away soon, I never will; but I feel like it is better the devil you know, then the devil you don?t know. I would really appreciate some guidance. I am afraid I won?t make the best decision for my two babies. He isn?t very kind to me; he is very abusive, distrustful and threatening. It has taken a long time and a lot of distance to break down, a little, his control of my emotions and feelings of self worth. I really need some ones insight into his character strengths and weaknesses and what is in store for our future.
Please respond
Dear Please respond
I can see your dilemma. I call this set up meeting your messiah. In other words you are so connected to this man you can?t help yourself and yet he is not good for you. The comparison was quite something, filled with love, hate, passion, deception, sorrow and so on. It is apparent that when he is feeling guilty, because he has done something that he probably shouldn?t, like cheats on you, he becomes abusive to cover it up. It is important that you don?t raise your children in this setting or they will grow up thinking that this is the way people should treat one another. I do not believe that your love is one-sided but I do believe that this man is not good for you. You are coming into a period that will be even more difficult where relationships are concerned. You can use this period to take further abuse from him or you can use this period to get out on your own with your children and start a new life. Neither will be easy but the later will certainly lead to a better future for you and your children. Opportunities for you to meet someone else are apparent and I believe you should do just that. It will help you forget about your abusive partner. Your chart also indicates that you are not likely to be with just one partner throughout your life. There is also evidence in your chart that you do attract men who will try to control and confine you. I suggest that you have an astrological evaluation done prior to giving your heart to the next man you want to become intimate with. Build on friendship first and you?ll stand a better chance of developing a long lasting union. You are coming into a high cycle where work and money are concerned. I feel confident that if you put your energy into your work, your children, your new home and meeting new friends and lovers you will find that your life will unfold quite nicely as we go into the year 2001. It sometimes helps to make a list of all the reasons that you feel that you should not be with your ex. Like the things he brings out in you that you don?t like and the things he does that you can?t live with. Every time he tries to contact you or you want to contact him pull out your list and read it just to remind yourself why you left him.
Eugenia
