We've all experienced times of conflict and personal struggle. Times when the assistance and advice of a friend always seemed to lend comfort and ease the burden. Have you ever wondered what it would be like if that friend was one of the world's most revered astrologers, with over 25 years of experience?
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I have decided to put more time and energy into my research. It’s been a pleasure to answer your emails and to help you through some of life’s tough journeys. Everyone who has participated in my Dear Eugenia column has enriched my life and I hope I have improved yours as well.
For those of you who wish to contribute birth data to my research, please enter your information to my medical astrology research listed on my home page. This research is explicitly dealing with cancer and mental health – addiction illness. The focus is on early diagnosis and preventative medicine.
I want to stress how important it is to submit complete and accurate birth data – the time and place of birth.
The following are our 'Dear Eugenia' letters archive:
Dear Eugenia
My boyfriend of 3yrs (have been friends for 18yrs) has a sexual hang-up. He needs pictures, from magazines, from mail-order videos xxxrated)and watches mpegs on x-rated web sites. But we never seem to have sex! He never wants to touch me. I have asked him if he is still attracted to me he of course said "Yes!!!" He, however, does not know just how much I know! I was cleaning our bed room one day and found videos for the camcorder under his dresser, I of course thinking they're just home videos, put them in the VCR, much to my surprise, they were of 2 of my neighbors!!! Not knowing they were being filmed. Also of my boyfriend pleasuring himself. I did ask him discreetly so as not to get caught, if he would ever or did he ever sleep with Miss. R. He said that it was gross of me to even ask him that and he was never nor could he ever be attracted to Miss. R. I don't know what to do since his little secret does affect our sex life. If I tell him all that I know, all his reply would be "what are you doing going through my things for?" His birthday is October 26,1961 @ 8:19 a.m. and mine is October 17, 1961, at 3:01 AM. Please help if you can!!!!
Sex Starved
Dear Sex Starved
Wow, quite the dilemma. One of the things that stood out loud and clear in your comparison was that his natal Venus really didn't hook up to your chart. That is usually an indication that problems can develop. However, the fact that he does have his natal Moon adversely aspected to his natal Pluto can result in problems that stem from his relationship with females (mother, sister and so on) when he was growing up. He does have his natal Moon aspecting his natal Venus in a favorable way so we know that he does like to have sex. He also has his natal Sun, Mars and Neptune in Scorpio (rules the sexual organs) in an area of his chart that deals with secrets so I'm not surprised that he has kept his fetishes out of sight. I must tell you however that many men and women enjoy looking at pictures, etc., that part isn't uncommon but to not want to have sex with you or touch you is a problem. If you really want to try to make this relationship work at a physical level, open and honest communication regarding one another's sexual likes and dislikes will have to be addressed. Your chart indicates that you have a healthy sexual appetite, therefore I suggest that you will have to begin by making suggestions or buying items that will turn him on. Read him a sexy short story out of an ex-rated magazine when you go to bed or show interest in watching some soft porn videos together. In order to get to the root of his needs and desires you will have to enter his private world. Give it a shot, after all I know that you're attracted to him by the way your natal Venus hooks up to his chart. Be creative in the bedroom and don't be afraid to have a little fun with the one you love.
Eugenia
Hello again Eugenia,
I wrote you last year in May, telling you about the problems with my husband (born January 31 1959, 2.50am) and my situation with the immigration status in US. I tried to follow your advice and go with him to marriage counseling, but the things were not very good. He didn't want to go first, and when he went, he said that the counseling it doesn't work for him because nobody will come to tell him that he is wrong, when he knows that he is right.
In December, last year, I found 4 email accounts full of emails back and forth with a lot of women. Many of them were very in love with him. He promised them marriage and a good situation in US. A women from Mexico called at the house and she was very upset when she found out that he is married. Nobody from his women in Internet knew that he is married. He recognized everything he did, but in the same time he doesn't want to be with me anymore. Its like: "I don't want you because you know too many things about me now."
Eugenia, I tried everything with this man, I tried to play by the rules in this marriage, but he deceived me so many times that I don't trust him anymore. He lied to me from the beginning, he controls me in every way you can think about it, and he abuses me mentally very hard. My main problem is the immigration situation in this moment; he keeps me stuck in the house, like a slave. From more than 6 months, I am trying to apply for getting a legal status in the country, together with my daughter, with a law who defends women and children who live in abusive relationships with their husbands, but because I don't have money to pay a lawyer (my husband controls all the finances), I was not able to find somebody to help me apply, even if I went to all the places where you can receive free legal services. I wanted to leave him many times in the last year, since I wrote you, but I don't have where to go and what to do. I cannot work and make a living together with my daughter without him. The situation is very difficult and I am really desperate.
My first question is if you see something about this situation in my chart, and when do you think that I will be able to resolve something?
Trying to find more things about my husband activity in Internet, going in chats and other sites where I found out he was all the time, I met a man, 2 months ago. He is psychologist and professor to a university, not very close to my city. Since February, we chat and emailed each other each day. We talked on the phone few times. We have good time together. We laugh a lot, and he is very considerate and nice...He was born October 15, 1957, at 12.26pm.He understood my situation, and we decided to take it slow because of my situation. He wants to meet me soon.
Sometimes I feel bad thinking that now I am doing the same thing my husband did with his secret life in Internet, but in the same time, I feel that I need somebody in my life to get through all this mess that I have to live, and mentally and emotionally I don't feel connected with my husband anymore. I don't think that he deserves my love and my respect after all the garbage he put on our life together.
Do I have any future with this new man in my life? I had so many bad experiences with my 2 divorces, now the 3rd husband is a real jerk, my horrible situation with the legal status and everything, and I am really afraid to suffer again. I don't want you to believe that I am jumping in a new relationship when I am still in such a mess.... but this guy seems to bring a lot of light in my miserable life....
Thank you a lot for all your help,
gabituca
Hi grabituca
You are taking the wrong approach by doing the same thing you are accusing your husband of doing. Think about your daughter not your physical needs right now. The man you have met on the internet does not match up to you at all in fact I do
Dear Eugenia,
I have been reading your advice for many years now and I need your help. I have been working at a job in relatively the same field now for over 20 yrs. I have many fears about leaving and going back to school to study because I don't feel it's the right thing. I keep thinking that I should be my own boss and start a sewing/designing company. I was born June 2,1963 @5:35am. My spouse was born Aug.8, 1962 @7:36pm. I feel he is there to support me most of the time but feel he's secretly jealous of anything I may accomplish beyond what I have so far. I really need to get some clear advise, I know if I have your astrological blessing in whatever I choose, I will succeed beyond my dreams. I was raised in a very strict household where boys were treated with more importance and the girls were expected to learn how to be good, quiet housewives, marry someone that would take care of them. I am not that person, but am still held back by my upbringing. I have so many self-doubts, and feel that I am too old or can't learn. I also don't have the finances to just leave my job and go to school. I just need some guidance. Please help me.
Audrey
Dear Audrey
Your chart indicates that you should have signed up for higher education already. Favorable transits will be with you until next summer so if you need to pick up skills in order to pursue your dream get busy. See if you can get the courses you need at night school or through correspondence. That way you can keep your job and you won't feel the financial crunch. Starting your own business is not a bad idea during the last quarter of next year however keep in mind that it is important to support your addiction to whatever your art or dream might be so prepare to work double duty by continuing to hold down your day job while you build your own business on the side. I know this may appear to be overwhelming but that is how most successful people get ahead - by working overtime for a few years. In that way it will be less of a risk. The comparison with your husband is okay and certainly workable. I do not feel so much that he is jealous of your accomplishments but really feeling vulnerable that you may outgrow him if you keep moving up in the world. You must make sure that on top of the heavy workload that you are about to take on that you do not neglect him and that you make him feel as if he is a part of it. My suggestions may sound like a tall order but believe me they can be accomplished. I know first hand because I worked in an unrelated field for seven years as I built up my business. So please don't be daunted by my suggestions - instead embrace them.Your chart does show some problems with health so don't let yourself get rundown just because you are stretched to the limit you still have to eat, sleep and exercise in order to stay strong enough to follow and complete your goals.
Eugenia
