We've all experienced times of conflict and personal struggle. Times when the assistance and advice of a friend always seemed to lend comfort and ease the burden. Have you ever wondered what it would be like if that friend was one of the world's most revered astrologers, with over 25 years of experience?
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I have decided to put more time and energy into my research. It’s been a pleasure to answer your emails and to help you through some of life’s tough journeys. Everyone who has participated in my Dear Eugenia column has enriched my life and I hope I have improved yours as well.
For those of you who wish to contribute birth data to my research, please enter your information to my medical astrology research listed on my home page. This research is explicitly dealing with cancer and mental health – addiction illness. The focus is on early diagnosis and preventative medicine.
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The following are our 'Dear Eugenia' letters archive:
Hello Eugenia,
This my second time attempting to write to you and to hopefully get some kind of feedback. I am a 21-year old female born 4-21-80 at 2:26 am, anyways, my question is relating to my status in the department in love; I have dated a lot of duds that never seem to live up to my expectations in love. I always settle for second best, I always stay with them when I know they are not being true to me, I always do all the phone calls to them and the "I love you's", and always in the end I get burned. I know it sounds like I'm complaining BIG time butI'm tired of falling in love with the wrong men. I get so jealous when I see happy couples around my age in love that I get bitter, depressed and angry.
But oddly, I'm in a relationship right now, a long distance one at that, but I'm not happy, but I'm holding on to it because I need to fill that empty space in my heart. So I guess what I'm asking is what path to take with this problem I have in love.
Confused (and Bitter) in Love
Dear Confused (and Bitter) in Love
You aren't alone. Many people pick the wrong person, stay in a relationship that isn't working for too long and so on. It usually has to do with a lack of confidence, self-esteem, fear of being alone etc. I must reiterate however that if you are involved with someone who isn't good for you it is hard to meet someone who could be. Your chart indicates that you are in a high cycle regarding love and will continue to be for the better part of the next year. You do need to get out and socialize and I suggest that when you do meet someone you have an astrological comparison done just to know what the pro's and cons of the relationship will be and how well you match up. You do well with those born under the signs Aries, Gemini, Leo, Sagittarius and Aquarius. Part of the problem that you have regarding picking the right partner is due to your natal Venus being opposite your natal Neptune. This can cause sorrow, deception and disillusionment if you aren't careful. Please consult my compatibility feature at www.astroadvice.com before you give your heart to another loser.
Dear Eugenia,
I used to read your horoscopes daily in the Kansas City newspaper. I wrote you around March to ask for your help regarding my situation with my husband (born November 17, 1976). At the time he was leaving me alone all of the time and telling me he no longer wanted to be married. You suggested that I leave him alone and concentrate on myself for a while because love would be more likely in the fall and either he'd return or I would find someone else. Right on cue he has returned asking to go back to how things were before. But now I've changed and I have met someone else (born May 7, 1973). Now I feel like I am being torn apart because I believe marriage is for life and I should be doing everything I can to make it work, but for so long I was trying so hard alone and was unwanted. I feel like there is too much that has taken place between us. The other person came into my life two months ago as a friend and something clicked between us. Now I don't know what to do. I am so hurt that all I want to do is run away from all of this. Please tell me who has the best comparison. In my heart I think I already know, but I really need advice. Thank you.
Perplexed
Dear Perplexed
I can certainly see your dilemma after running an astrological comparison between you and the two men in your life. They both match up about the same. In the case of your Taurus friend I do have to say that there is some sorrow that shows up in the comparison so I believe that if you choose him you will have regrets or that it won't end up being any better with him than it is with your husband. With your husband I believe that you can't just let him come back with the intentions of having things be the same as they were before he left. I believe that you must set some ground rules. That you must talk about why your marriage wasn't working and what you both need from one another in order to make it better. Keeping things the same will only result in a vicious circle. The comparison with your husband is better physically and mentally and although that may not be apparent right now it is only because you have been with him so much longer than you have with your Taurus friend. I believe you owe it to yourself and to your husband to give it another chance. Please communicate this time so that things don't go array.
Eugenia
Dear Eugenia
Where to start. First of all I guess that I should tell you that I met my husband and I have been with my husband for 20 years. Married for 17. Beautiful children. I have been very unhappy for a longtime. My husband is verbally, mentally, and worst of all physically abusive. I live everyday in fear, and am always trying to make everything happy and peaceful. I am always living planning the next step of the day out to make sure that it is going to make him happy. I am the bread winner in the family, I have to take care of all of the other responsibilities to, cooking, cleaning, bills, children, laundry, and even making his phone calls for his job etc for him. I should mention that he does work as well, but that is his only responsibility. I feel like an awful person for what I am about to tell you, but I have gotten to the point of being desperate for an answer. About 9 years ago, I met our now best friend. He has always been so nice to me. He is a very patient kind person. He is also in a relationship (not married, but do live together) and has wonderful children. His partner is a very angry person and yells constantly at her children it is so sad. I am very close with his children and love them very much. I have always had feelings for him, however never had said anything. We have always sat up and talked for hours on end when he has come over. About 2 1/2 years ago we were sitting and talking and it came out that we both had feelings for each other. I have never been so shocked, I never would have guessed. He told me at the time that he didn't know what to do, as he couldn't imagine waking up and not being in the same house as his children, that they were his life, and I think that is wonderful. We seem to go in spurts of calling each other, and then periods of not calling each other. However, neither one of us seem to be able to talk about our feelings. We have kissed, and it has been truly wonderful. But I do feel very guilty. I cannot stop thinking about him, I think of him when I wake up, through the day, when I go to bed. It's driving me crazy. I wonder if you can tell me what he is thinking. What he feels for me? My birthday is October 9, 1971, his is April 18, 1977, and my husband's is September 7, 1970. If you could please offer me any insight I would be truly grateful.
Libra
Dear Libra
First of all I want to deal with your relationship with your husband. You don't have one, nor do you need him in your life. You are only teaching your children that it is okay for a man to be abusive to a woman and that in it self is wrong and should have been enough for you to move on with your kids long ago.
It appears to me the only reason you are considering doing so now is because you have someone else in your life but that is not the way to start off a good relationship. I understand why you are attracted to your friend but the comparison although superior to the one with your husband it still isn't great. It is apparent that the connection with your friend is Karmic and I believe his debt is to help you remove yourself and your children from the miserable situation you have put up with for too long however after that it will be time for you to move on and start over.
You do not need your husband so cut your losses and get on with your life. You've already wasted too much time and the damage that the kids have endured watching you being abused are probably insurmountable at this point.
Your chart indicates that you probably should have made your move last year but it's still not too late if you take action immediately. As for your love life - it will pick up during the second half of this year once you have rid yourself of the dead weight you've been living with for so many years. What were you thinking when you married this man - it is seldom I see two people stay together as long as the two of you have when you
