We've all experienced times of conflict and personal struggle. Times when the assistance and advice of a friend always seemed to lend comfort and ease the burden. Have you ever wondered what it would be like if that friend was one of the world's most revered astrologers, with over 25 years of experience?
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I have decided to put more time and energy into my research. It’s been a pleasure to answer your emails and to help you through some of life’s tough journeys. Everyone who has participated in my Dear Eugenia column has enriched my life and I hope I have improved yours as well.
For those of you who wish to contribute birth data to my research, please enter your information to my medical astrology research listed on my home page. This research is explicitly dealing with cancer and mental health – addiction illness. The focus is on early diagnosis and preventative medicine.
I want to stress how important it is to submit complete and accurate birth data – the time and place of birth.
The following are our 'Dear Eugenia' letters archive:
Hello Eugenia,
This my second time attempting to write to you and to hopefully get some kind of feedback. I am a 21-year old female born 4-21-80 at 2:26 am, anyways, my question is relating to my status in the department in love; I have dated a lot of duds that never seem to live up to my expectations in love. I always settle for second best, I always stay with them when I know they are not being true to me, I always do all the phone calls to them and the "I love you's", and always in the end I get burned. I know it sounds like I'm complaining BIG time butI'm tired of falling in love with the wrong men. I get so jealous when I see happy couples around my age in love that I get bitter, depressed and angry.
But oddly, I'm in a relationship right now, a long distance one at that, but I'm not happy, but I'm holding on to it because I need to fill that empty space in my heart. So I guess what I'm asking is what path to take with this problem I have in love.
Confused (and Bitter) in Love
Dear Confused (and Bitter) in Love
You aren't alone. Many people pick the wrong person, stay in a relationship that isn't working for too long and so on. It usually has to do with a lack of confidence, self-esteem, fear of being alone etc. I must reiterate however that if you are involved with someone who isn't good for you it is hard to meet someone who could be. Your chart indicates that you are in a high cycle regarding love and will continue to be for the better part of the next year. You do need to get out and socialize and I suggest that when you do meet someone you have an astrological comparison done just to know what the pro's and cons of the relationship will be and how well you match up. You do well with those born under the signs Aries, Gemini, Leo, Sagittarius and Aquarius. Part of the problem that you have regarding picking the right partner is due to your natal Venus being opposite your natal Neptune. This can cause sorrow, deception and disillusionment if you aren't careful. Please consult my compatibility feature at www.astroadvice.com before you give your heart to another loser.
Dear Eugenia,
Many years ago I consulted an astrologer about my chances of marrying happily, and he replied, "Do you really want to know?" He seemed so evasive and reluctant that I didn't push it. A year or two later I met my husband (9/17/53) and we have been together for nearly fifteen years. I have since learned a little about astrology and decided that the reason the astrologer was so reticent is that I have Neptune in Scorpio in the seventh house. I think this has manifested mostly in my husband's struggles with alcohol; about three years ago he finally made a major effort and got his drinking under control. Unfortunately at the same time-- I wonder if it was the catalyst-- I reconnected with an old friend (11/11/61) who is in the same line of creative work I am. Although this relationship upset my husband I did not give it up. I realize that this person is a friend and not a suitable candidate for husband/father (we have three children) but I cannot convince my husband that is the case, even though I have been faithful to him and the other relationship is somewhat tenuous. Is it that my husband is being super controlling or am I not being honest? If I give up my friend will my husband go back to drinking? The astrology books are not very reassuring on the Neptune in the seventh house thing, so I wonder if I am stuck with relationship weirdness no matter what, or if I would just be better off being a nun. My birthday is 4/4/65, at 6 AM.
Thank you--
"Doomed by Neptune"
Dear "Doomed by Neptune"
First of all your Neptune may be in your seventh house but it is well aspected to your natal Saturn and Pluto and yes it does oppose your Moon and Jupiter as well but don't lose sight of the fact that the Moon is well aspsected to both Saturn and Pluto as well. This should give you an overall positive skew on your relationship capability. Now you are right regarding partners being of an escapist nature but that doesn't mean that you can't have a successful relationship and that your current partner can't pull his act together. This set up can be highly creative sexually if that's where the energy is put and obviously you and your husband did just that, the result being your three children. With your Neptune Jupiter opposition and of course Jupiter being in your first house you can tend to overreact a bit and may not be totally honest with yourself or your partner at an emotional level. I feel that your past acquaintance is really not the issue as you do not match up to him well. As a matter of fact it is more like a sister brother connection and a strained one at that. Your Scorpio friend falls in an area of your chart that deals with dead end projects. As for your husband your comparison was okay but sorrow does prevail especially with regard to his drinking problem. With his natal Neptune in an adverse position to his natal Uranus I believe that he could fall off the wagon from time to time. However, it probably won't be the result of your friendship with your Scorpio friend. Your Scorpio however should only be someone that you deal with as a direct result of work and nothing more. If you want your marriage to work you and your husband will have to work together in order to keep his problem under control. If he can't handle it and continually gets inebriated you will have to make a decision based on what's best for you and your children. Your husband falls in an area of your chart that deals with children and partying and that is probably how things started out some 15 years ago however times have changed and he's going to have to pull up his socks or expect to lose his family.
Eugenia
Hi Eugenia!
I know you are busy, but I was just wondering if you were going to be able to answer my e-mails concerning the future for my ex-boyfriend and me. I don't really want to get into the details again as it would take too long, but I have written to you at least twice before, maybe 3 times, explaining our situation and my dilemma and asking for your advice. As it stands now, we are not together and haven't been since last October. We haven't spoken since January 9th, at which time he was still not willing to even commit to me to the extent that he had before we split up in September of 2003. And at that time, his extent of commitment was less than I could accept, which is why I moved out. The last time we spoke, I told him for the millionth time not to call me until he was serious about trying to make things work between us because it hurts too much. Although as I said, I had told him this before to no avail, this time it must have sunk in because we haven't spoken since. I work in a convenience store, and I did see him drive thru the parking lot one day, and he has been in the store twice when I wasn't there. He also has called my house 3 or 4 times and hung up without leaving a message. And once he called while I wasn't home and left a message saying, "he just wanted to hear my voice". Please Eugenia, can you tell me what you see happening for us in the future? I still love him and am so in love with him. I miss him like crazy and a day doesn't go by that I don't think about him. Do you see us getting back together in the future? I feel like he's my soul mate, and he says the same about me. Do you think that maybe if we are apart for a while he may learn to appreciate me and the relationship we had together, or do you think it's pretty much a lost cause? Please help Eugenia, I feel so confused. I was born February 16, 1963 at 12:10 p.m. in Dayton, Ohio and Roger was born December 21, 1958 at 1:15 p.m. in San Bernardino, California.
Thanks,
Sandy
Hi Sandy
You do match up to your Sagittarius mate quite well and it's a shame that you aren't together however I believe that it is a commitment problem on his part. If you have followed my work you are aware of the number of times I have mentioned that Sagittarius is the one sign that has a terrible time with commitment. They are the born bachelors of the zodiac and no matter how much they love someone the thought of being confined by or committed to someone is quite horrifying. I do believe that this man loves you and that he isn't likely to find someone that he has as great a comparison with but yikes trying to get him to commit may take a lifetime. There is one hope however and that is that beginning this Summer the planet Saturn is moving into the sign Leo for approximately two and a half years and during that time he just might feel a little more comfortable with the whole settling down thing. For you the best thing to do is not to push commitment but to enjoy this man for who he is. After all that's who you fell in love with. I'm not saying that you should put up with poor behavior or not being treated well but as long as he is doing his part I don't think I would worry so much about signing a piece of paper or saying your vows. All too many times I have seen couples live together for a number of years and when the one finally convinces the other to do the legal trip down the aisle it often leads to a complete break down of the relationship within a year or two after finally getting married. Reevaluate what you really want out of this relationship - the man himself or his vow to never leave you. Please keep in mind that there are no guarantees even if you do tie the knot.
Eugenia
