We've all experienced times of conflict and personal struggle. Times when the assistance and advice of a friend always seemed to lend comfort and ease the burden. Have you ever wondered what it would be like if that friend was one of the world's most revered astrologers, with over 25 years of experience?
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I have decided to put more time and energy into my research. It’s been a pleasure to answer your emails and to help you through some of life’s tough journeys. Everyone who has participated in my Dear Eugenia column has enriched my life and I hope I have improved yours as well.
For those of you who wish to contribute birth data to my research, please enter your information to my medical astrology research listed on my home page. This research is explicitly dealing with cancer and mental health – addiction illness. The focus is on early diagnosis and preventative medicine.
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The following are our 'Dear Eugenia' letters archive:
Dear Eugenia
I will be marrying a German guy this September. His birthday is August 28, 1970, at 6:20 pm. My date of birth is May 5, 1975, at 3:00 PM. Our wedding is scheduled for Sept 23, Sunday. We've been going out for 1 yr and 2 months and overcome our language barriers. We finally decided to get married. However, what I'd like to know is...should I marry him?
When I first met him, I was attracted to him. He spoke to me first in poor English and that's how he took my heart away. He's tall and good-looking. He's always nice to women so I'm always worried. Also, he doesn't tell me what he thinks. We have been living together for about one year. Since both of us are working, when we get home, he just stays in his computer room. About sex, I always have to ask him because he doesn't take initiative. We have sex about 4 to 5 times a month. Sometimes, I want to have it but it seems that he doesn't care. I feel like I'm asking too much. And I'm worried...
However, I saw him browsing through porn sites several times. Plus, when we need to make a decision, he always lets me do everything. It doesn't matter whether he likes it or not. In the beginning, I thought that he was nice so he let me do whatever I want. But now, I'm sick of this... When he said that he had to go to workshops for his company, I'm always worried too. He always says that I'm pretty but he doesn't take initiative for sex, I 'm afraid that some other beautiful women might ask him out. Sometimes, I can't sleep because of this but it seems he doesn't realize my situation. Our wedding day is coming soon but I'm still worried. I don't want to lose him, but I'm afraid that I may give up because I'm too tired. If possible, please give me some advice.
At Odds
Dear At Odds
I don't know why either one of you is pushing to get married. It is apparent that you have issues to resolve before you decide to step into matrimony. The comparison does indicate a lack of sexual attraction. His chart denotes sexual confusion at an emotional level with his natal Moon square his natal Jupiter in his eighth house. With his natal Venus in his eighth house as well sextile to his natal Mars I would imagine that he definitely has sexual desires. The question is how they manifest themselves with his natal Saturn and his natal Neptune squaring his natal Mars. He needs to determine what turns him on and whether or not you can provide him with what he desires and vise versa. I suggest that you get into sexual counseling as a couple before you take the next step. Communication is required in order to sort through your problems. It doesn't mean that your relationship can't work but like any other relationship nothing is perfect and it's best to sort out what you can before you decide to make a life long commitment to one another.
Eugenia
Hello Eugenia,
This my second time attempting to write to you and to hopefully get some kind of feedback. I am a 21-year old female born 4-21-80 at 2:26 am, anyways, my question is relating to my status in the department in love; I have dated a lot of duds that never seem to live up to my expectations in love. I always settle for second best, I always stay with them when I know they are not being true to me, I always do all the phone calls to them and the "I love you's", and always in the end I get burned. I know it sounds like I'm complaining BIG time butI'm tired of falling in love with the wrong men. I get so jealous when I see happy couples around my age in love that I get bitter, depressed and angry.
But oddly, I'm in a relationship right now, a long distance one at that, but I'm not happy, but I'm holding on to it because I need to fill that empty space in my heart. So I guess what I'm asking is what path to take with this problem I have in love.
Confused (and Bitter) in Love
Dear Confused (and Bitter) in Love
You aren't alone. Many people pick the wrong person, stay in a relationship that isn't working for too long and so on. It usually has to do with a lack of confidence, self-esteem, fear of being alone etc. I must reiterate however that if you are involved with someone who isn't good for you it is hard to meet someone who could be. Your chart indicates that you are in a high cycle regarding love and will continue to be for the better part of the next year. You do need to get out and socialize and I suggest that when you do meet someone you have an astrological comparison done just to know what the pro's and cons of the relationship will be and how well you match up. You do well with those born under the signs Aries, Gemini, Leo, Sagittarius and Aquarius. Part of the problem that you have regarding picking the right partner is due to your natal Venus being opposite your natal Neptune. This can cause sorrow, deception and disillusionment if you aren't careful. Please consult my compatibility feature at www.astroadvice.com before you give your heart to another loser.
Dear Eugenia,
I wrote to you years ago, when I was in a very serious relationship, which you predicted, would come to an end due to our young age, but you added that I would be lucky in love again. You were right, my boyfriend (14/02/1974) and I (07/08/1973, at 7:20 am) were in love at 17. He was a fantastic person who truly cared for me. But at 21, I decided I needed time to explore my life. And so, I finished college (PR) and wanted to travel. Before my boyfriend and I officially split, I had an encounter with a mature man (03/10/1950?) who would leave a profound impression on me. This Libra happened to be my manager. He had a huge crush on me, but he never did anything to breakup his marriage or anything. Yet, he made such an impact in my life because of his sophisticated Libra ways--plus, he showered me with compliments. Nevertheless, my boyfriend and I broke up and I got on the plane for my European adventure, after innocently kissing the boss farewell. When I returned, I contacted my old boss for a reference and job leads. He was very helpful and a joy to talk to. I managed to get myself a great job and ended up doing creative work--which he always inspired me to do. With 19 months of work in my portfolio, I was eager to see my old manager to show him what I've done with my life. He wouldn't meet me, even for a lunch. Knowing that he was still married (I was single), I didn't press him. Nearly eight years later, I was now married to (24/06/1971). Life added another twist, bringing me back to the "old" neighborhood where my manager and I worked. On a lunch break from a day seminar, I ate in our old spot. Feeling nostalgic, I couldn't help writing a thank you note to my mentor, as the course I was on that day continued the career path he had set me on. Spontaneously, I scribbled a letter on napkins. I stuck it into my purse and forgot about it for almost a year. Spring-cleaning had me clearing out my closet and... well, I just had to find my old boss and I did, and I was sure he'd be over the middle-age crisis crush and meet me for a coffee. No! He still had feelings for me, saying he would have to sit on his hands--he was still attracted to me. I laughed it off and retorted: "you're such a flirt". Settling for e-mailing, we ended up in constant cravings for e-contact. Our conversations flowed naturally. He told me he was separated. I felt I had to see him. I did. I hugged him for an eternity and suddenly we shared a kiss. I was thrilled to see him--and felt wonderful to have him back in my life. I value his opinions and cherish industry information and valuable support he gives me. Problem: I had no idea I had feelings for him also. I soon found myself day dreaming about him. We meet a few times after, and each time our emotions got the better of us (nothing beyond hugging, kissing). I told him I was very much in love with my husband and he said he couldn't resolve his feelings for me, and decided for both our interests to ignore me--we both disagreed to an affair. I agreed and months later, I miss him sooooooooooo much.!
I'm in love with my husband, but I need to know how my manager is doing? is he happy?, how's he managing with life, career, love, and family?--he's got his kids and he's such a great dad. Will we ever see each other again? Can we get over this "puppy love" and continue to love and cherish each other in a platonic relationship?
Leo
Dear Leo
I can see why you are in such a state. First of all you continue to match up the best to your boyfriend from way back when (Feb. 14/74), and there is nothing wrong with that. You were both too young and had too much life to live before settling down however even though you did manage to get out and do your own thing you somehow got caught in a whirlwind romance with your manager and even though it was platonic, in mind it definitely was not. You match up to both your husband and
