We've all experienced times of conflict and personal struggle. Times when the assistance and advice of a friend always seemed to lend comfort and ease the burden. Have you ever wondered what it would be like if that friend was one of the world's most revered astrologers, with over 25 years of experience?
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I have decided to put more time and energy into my research. It’s been a pleasure to answer your emails and to help you through some of life’s tough journeys. Everyone who has participated in my Dear Eugenia column has enriched my life and I hope I have improved yours as well.
For those of you who wish to contribute birth data to my research, please enter your information to my medical astrology research listed on my home page. This research is explicitly dealing with cancer and mental health – addiction illness. The focus is on early diagnosis and preventative medicine.
I want to stress how important it is to submit complete and accurate birth data – the time and place of birth.
The following are our 'Dear Eugenia' letters archive:
Dear Eugenia
I will be marrying a German guy this September. His birthday is August 28, 1970, at 6:20 pm. My date of birth is May 5, 1975, at 3:00 PM. Our wedding is scheduled for Sept 23, Sunday. We've been going out for 1 yr and 2 months and overcome our language barriers. We finally decided to get married. However, what I'd like to know is...should I marry him?
When I first met him, I was attracted to him. He spoke to me first in poor English and that's how he took my heart away. He's tall and good-looking. He's always nice to women so I'm always worried. Also, he doesn't tell me what he thinks. We have been living together for about one year. Since both of us are working, when we get home, he just stays in his computer room. About sex, I always have to ask him because he doesn't take initiative. We have sex about 4 to 5 times a month. Sometimes, I want to have it but it seems that he doesn't care. I feel like I'm asking too much. And I'm worried...
However, I saw him browsing through porn sites several times. Plus, when we need to make a decision, he always lets me do everything. It doesn't matter whether he likes it or not. In the beginning, I thought that he was nice so he let me do whatever I want. But now, I'm sick of this... When he said that he had to go to workshops for his company, I'm always worried too. He always says that I'm pretty but he doesn't take initiative for sex, I 'm afraid that some other beautiful women might ask him out. Sometimes, I can't sleep because of this but it seems he doesn't realize my situation. Our wedding day is coming soon but I'm still worried. I don't want to lose him, but I'm afraid that I may give up because I'm too tired. If possible, please give me some advice.
At Odds
Dear At Odds
I don't know why either one of you is pushing to get married. It is apparent that you have issues to resolve before you decide to step into matrimony. The comparison does indicate a lack of sexual attraction. His chart denotes sexual confusion at an emotional level with his natal Moon square his natal Jupiter in his eighth house. With his natal Venus in his eighth house as well sextile to his natal Mars I would imagine that he definitely has sexual desires. The question is how they manifest themselves with his natal Saturn and his natal Neptune squaring his natal Mars. He needs to determine what turns him on and whether or not you can provide him with what he desires and vise versa. I suggest that you get into sexual counseling as a couple before you take the next step. Communication is required in order to sort through your problems. It doesn't mean that your relationship can't work but like any other relationship nothing is perfect and it's best to sort out what you can before you decide to make a life long commitment to one another.
Eugenia
Dear Eugenia,
I have known this boy which I will call J for about 2 years. I knew him from the time I accidentally knocked him down with my bicycle and sent him to the hospital. We have been dating since. However, everyone despises him because he has a scar on his forehead. My father (my mum's passed away) is sure that he was once a gangster and declared that he would not let me be with a gangster. The problem is, I know he is not a gangster and that he got the scar when he was 6 years old through an unfortunate incident but there is no way my father or anyone will change their views about him, despite the fact he's a polite and helpful man. J likes me a lot and vice versa. I could tell his sex drive is great because he always seems to be looking at me in a 'weird sort of way' but he respects my decision to remain a virgin till marriage. Recently, he suggested that we elope because my father is putting too much pressure on us which I admit but I'm still not sure. For one thing, I cannot leave my father behind just like that. But I love J a lot and would like to be with him forever. I really don't know what to do now. His birthday is 21 November, 12.01 AM and I'm a Virgo born on 19 September, 1982, at 4:37 AM. What should I do, Eugenia?
Desperate Virgo
Dear Desperate Virgo
You didn?t specify your boyfriend?s year of birth and that can make my assessment difficult. However, I can tell you that honesty is the best policy and that you should sit down and talk to your father. Let him know how strongly you feel and how much it means to you that he make an effort to get to know your Scorpio friend better. You have an interesting chart that shows great promise in an area that deals with your career. The next few years it will be crucial that you spend time focusing on what you want to be, and do, with the rest of your life. Educational pursuits should be your focus right now followed by a good paying job that you enjoy.
You may be a Virgo but you have a strong Libra influence and that is usually an indicator that you will be much happier throughout life if you have balance, harmony and monetary satisfaction. Without your Scorpio?s year of birth I can not tell you if he will satisfy your needs. I can tell you that he falls in an area of your chart that does denote a strong friendship. If you continue to build your friendship slowly you may eventually gain your fathers confidence in your relationship. You might also consider listening to why your father?s negativity regarding your boyfriend?s background is so strong. Maybe he knows something that you don?t.
Eugenia
Hi Eugenia
My husband has a drinking problem. He has been able to control this problem for the past 5-6 years. Recently he has begun drinking again and there is starting to be the same kind of mental abuse as he displayed in the past. I am at the age where I do not feel I can repeat and repeat this sort of abuse and lifestyle. Money is also becoming an issue as he continues to drink. He continues to threaten to leave and I am at the point where if not for my financial position, I would put the entire relationship behind me and move on alone. Is this a good idea?.......Please help, he is born July 10, 1951 at 6:30 a.m. and I April 25, 1944, at 10 a.m.
Stay or Leave
Dear Stay or Leave
I believe that your husband will become worse before he becomes better. The next year and a half will be filled with all sorts of limitations for him regarding health, authority figures, dealing with institutions and so forth. I feel that the past couple of years you have taken the brunt of his obvious lack of control and abuse and now is the time to give him an ultimatum. Should he leave he will go down hill over the course of the next couple of years. Should he seek help it will take him the next couple of years to reform. As for you I feel that the time for change is fast approaching. That you should be seeking help from women's groups and co-dependent organizations in order to get back on your feet and away from him. Your comparison did indicate that there has been love in the past with this man but that was probably a long time ago. There is also sorrow especially where substance abuse is concerned and because of this I feel that even if he does seek help that there will always be the potential for him to slip over and over again. I do not believe that you will ever be able to fully put his abuse behind you and that your reason for staying with this man has more to do with fear of being alone and lack of funds. Your chart indicates that you are youthful and entertaining and that you will be okay if you can only get yourself out of this situation. By all means - if he wants to leave let him go.
Eugenia
