We've all experienced times of conflict and personal struggle. Times when the assistance and advice of a friend always seemed to lend comfort and ease the burden. Have you ever wondered what it would be like if that friend was one of the world's most revered astrologers, with over 25 years of experience?
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I have decided to put more time and energy into my research. It’s been a pleasure to answer your emails and to help you through some of life’s tough journeys. Everyone who has participated in my Dear Eugenia column has enriched my life and I hope I have improved yours as well.
For those of you who wish to contribute birth data to my research, please enter your information to my medical astrology research listed on my home page. This research is explicitly dealing with cancer and mental health – addiction illness. The focus is on early diagnosis and preventative medicine.
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The following are our 'Dear Eugenia' letters archive:
Dear Eugenia
I will be marrying a German guy this September. His birthday is August 28, 1970, at 6:20 pm. My date of birth is May 5, 1975, at 3:00 PM. Our wedding is scheduled for Sept 23, Sunday. We've been going out for 1 yr and 2 months and overcome our language barriers. We finally decided to get married. However, what I'd like to know is...should I marry him?
When I first met him, I was attracted to him. He spoke to me first in poor English and that's how he took my heart away. He's tall and good-looking. He's always nice to women so I'm always worried. Also, he doesn't tell me what he thinks. We have been living together for about one year. Since both of us are working, when we get home, he just stays in his computer room. About sex, I always have to ask him because he doesn't take initiative. We have sex about 4 to 5 times a month. Sometimes, I want to have it but it seems that he doesn't care. I feel like I'm asking too much. And I'm worried...
However, I saw him browsing through porn sites several times. Plus, when we need to make a decision, he always lets me do everything. It doesn't matter whether he likes it or not. In the beginning, I thought that he was nice so he let me do whatever I want. But now, I'm sick of this... When he said that he had to go to workshops for his company, I'm always worried too. He always says that I'm pretty but he doesn't take initiative for sex, I 'm afraid that some other beautiful women might ask him out. Sometimes, I can't sleep because of this but it seems he doesn't realize my situation. Our wedding day is coming soon but I'm still worried. I don't want to lose him, but I'm afraid that I may give up because I'm too tired. If possible, please give me some advice.
At Odds
Dear At Odds
I don't know why either one of you is pushing to get married. It is apparent that you have issues to resolve before you decide to step into matrimony. The comparison does indicate a lack of sexual attraction. His chart denotes sexual confusion at an emotional level with his natal Moon square his natal Jupiter in his eighth house. With his natal Venus in his eighth house as well sextile to his natal Mars I would imagine that he definitely has sexual desires. The question is how they manifest themselves with his natal Saturn and his natal Neptune squaring his natal Mars. He needs to determine what turns him on and whether or not you can provide him with what he desires and vise versa. I suggest that you get into sexual counseling as a couple before you take the next step. Communication is required in order to sort through your problems. It doesn't mean that your relationship can't work but like any other relationship nothing is perfect and it's best to sort out what you can before you decide to make a life long commitment to one another.
Eugenia
Dear Eugenia
I am dating one guy, and I have feelings for my best friend. My best friend recently confessed his feelings for me. But my boyfriend and I have a decent relationship. Also I feel me and my boyfriend may be drifting apart just a little. I came to this conclusion because we use to just sit and talk for hours on end but now we rarely talk about anything. I need help on what I should do in this situation. Oh I also forgot to mention I have had feelings for my best friend since I met him 12 years ago, and that he is in the military and he confessed his feelings for me after he came back from overseas saying how he realized that he " has a great person who cares for him right in front of him." Thank you for your time and help! By the way my boyfriends birth data is: Nov 21, 1984 I am not sure of the time or the birthplace though. And my friends birth data is August10, 1984 I am also not sure of the birth time or place for him either. I was born September 25, 1983 at 11:25 AM.
Libra
Dear Libra
Quite the dilemma - you actually match up astrologically to both men. Your best friend a little bit better. Your best friend falls in an area of your chart that deals with your status, position in society and choice of friends. I've always believed that the best relationships are those that start out as a friendship and build. Your current boyfriend falls in an area of your chart that deals with hidden matters, secret affairs etc so I'm sort of wondering how you managed to turn this one into a long term relationship when it was probably meant to be a short but sweet love connection.
Your chart indicates that you are going through a period of change. Especially the way you view your relationships with others. This started to hit your chart at the end of last year and has probably left you somewhat confused. I don't know that you will ever feel totally satisfied in your current relationship especially now that you know that your best friend feels the same way you do.
Your chart indicates that you are moving through a period of change. That it may be time to take a break from your current relationship so that you can sort out your thoughts and discover what it is you really need when it comes to a one-on-one relationship. Don't feel bad but don't live a lie either. If you truly want to find out if your relationship with your best friend can be more you are best to end the relationship you are in first. I feel that given time your friendship with your Leo man will turn into a long-lasting relationship.
Eugenia
Dear Eugenia,
In January of 97 I became romantically involved with my teacher (his birth date:Aug.19,1950). He is married (his wife born Aug.10,1955). He had assured me that there was no romantic involvement with her and that he loved me, that the only reason he didn't leave her was because of his child, that theirs was a "business relationship." I believed him and loved him deeply, but recently found out that he still was having relations occasionally with her. He said that all along his feelings had been conflicting, that he didn't want to give her up, so when I said I wanted fidelity, he dumped me. His wife told me she plans to "punish" him. I am hurting terribly because I still love him very much. It is also going to hurt my studies, because he won't allow me in his classes any more. He had also gotten me a job at one of the places where he works. The day he ended the relationship (because I "pushed" him too far, he said), May 3rd (this year), I was angry and said I wanted to quit that job, so he cancelled my involvement in a joint project we were working on, which hurt my students as well as myself. I feel so hurt I cry all the time and wish I could die. I wish I had never said anything, and that our relationship had continued. Now I feel like my whole life is falling apart, because everything I did revolved around him. I have been to the counselor at school; she has been sympathetic but has no suggestions. He calls me sometimes, he says because he is sorry he hurt me, but he offers me no hope. He said he still doesn't know how he feels about anything, that I should do nothing and let time work things out. But I feel like I need to make some decisions about my life. Can you please help me? I don't even know what question to ask you, but perhaps you have some ideas. Thank you for reading my letter. It feels better just to know that you have "listened."
Sincerely,
Teachers Pet
Dear Teachers Pet
What were you thinking? Your comparison with your philandering professor wasn't all that great, for that matter his comparison with his wife wasn't earth shattering either. You are both dealing with a man who is full of himself and very capable of having secret affairs with women who are vulnerable or na?ve enough to believe his dribble. You unfortunately have been going through a very rough couple of years where love and relationships are concerned. Although your chart does denote that you could have someone from your past waltz back into your life, I certainly hope that you have enough will power to say no this time around. You should feel sorry for this man and even sorrier for his wife, whom I must say has also gone through similar transits to you regarding her relationship. I must mention that your chart and his wife's have an uncanny resemblance. I know that you are confused, hurting and you just want to be happy but strength and control will be necessary. I think that the more you back away from this man, the more he will want to come closer. It's hard to control what's in your heart especially when you are as sensitive and loving as you are. You were looking for that white knight who could stimulate you mentally and physically and we all know how hard that is to find. Please try to put this relationship in perspective and move on with your life. You will be in a high cycle for love and romance in June and I would hate to see you waste it on this man. You deserve better and I know that if you get out and join groups or organizations that you believe in you will meet like-minded people who can turn your crank. You match up well to those born under the signs Virgo, Capricorn and Pisces.
Eugenia
