We've all experienced times of conflict and personal struggle. Times when the assistance and advice of a friend always seemed to lend comfort and ease the burden. Have you ever wondered what it would be like if that friend was one of the world's most revered astrologers, with over 25 years of experience?
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I have decided to put more time and energy into my research. It’s been a pleasure to answer your emails and to help you through some of life’s tough journeys. Everyone who has participated in my Dear Eugenia column has enriched my life and I hope I have improved yours as well.
For those of you who wish to contribute birth data to my research, please enter your information to my medical astrology research listed on my home page. This research is explicitly dealing with cancer and mental health – addiction illness. The focus is on early diagnosis and preventative medicine.
I want to stress how important it is to submit complete and accurate birth data – the time and place of birth.
The following are our 'Dear Eugenia' letters archive:
Dear Eugenia,
I am in deep conflict over my relationship right now, and I would like to know if my chart can give me any insight into the feelings that I have right now, a course of action or whether this is just a temporary time of confusion.I have been in a relationship for over seven years. However, two years ago, about the time I turned 30, things seemed to change between us. I feel a restless desire to move on, that we are better off as friends than as partners, and that my relationship with him was a mistake. To complicate things, I cannot forget a past relationship (the person is not currently in my life) and the feelings of regret have been getting stronger over the same two years. The past relationship fell apart in late 1990 over a series of misunderstandings.I really don't know what to do. On the one hand, I feel terrible uprooting my partner's life. On the other hand, I just can't seem to give him what he needs in terms of love. While the past relationship was difficult, there was a passion and connection there that I miss intensely. It is getting to the point where both of us are unhappy due to my moodiness. I don't expect the person from the past to come back into my life, but I sometimes wonder if I would be better off alone than causing such turmoil.
My birth information is 8/21/69 3:30am, my current partners information is 12/10/69, and the past partners information is 10/21/66 (I don't know their birth times). Can you help?
Stay or Go
Dear Stay or Go
The relationship that you are currently in does compare more like a friendship or brother sister relationship and it probably is time to move on. I don't believe that this will be easy for you due to the friends and family connections that you have made over the past seven years. Next year you will be coming into a period that is great for both new romantic connections as well as hooking up with people from your past. My biggest concern however is that you will end up spending time with someone who may still be involved with someone else. If you can avoid this type of scenario I believe that you can find happiness and comfort with someone new. What you have been through is your Saturn return and that was the reason you reevaluated your life up until this point and have come to the conclusion that you are probably living a lie. Most people consider this a turning point in life. You now have a choice to make and it won't be all that easy. Do you stay or do you leave. I believe that you need to make the move even though it will be difficult. I also feel however that if done the right way you may be able to salvage some of what you've got. Communication, although not always easy to get a Sagittarius to talk about issues, is where you must start. If you can discover your relationship as being a friendship only you may be able to move on and yet stay in touch. There is never any harm in trying. If that's not the case get moving anyway. After all you do want to be free when your romantic opportunities start happening next year. By the way your comparison with the Libra from your past was quite good. You probably just met at the wrong time. I believe that when you are in your high romantic cycle that he will be in a cycle that is good for him mentally but not romantically or physically. Perhaps he will be in another relationship. If this is the case you are best to back off for the time being. There is a chance that the right time to get together with him will never occur however that is hard to tell without his actual birth time.
Eugenia
Dear Eugenia,
Many years ago I consulted an astrologer about my chances of marrying happily, and he replied, "Do you really want to know?" He seemed so evasive and reluctant that I didn't push it. A year or two later I met my husband (9/17/53) and we have been together for nearly fifteen years. I have since learned a little about astrology and decided that the reason the astrologer was so reticent is that I have Neptune in Scorpio in the seventh house. I think this has manifested mostly in my husband's struggles with alcohol; about three years ago he finally made a major effort and got his drinking under control. Unfortunately at the same time-- I wonder if it was the catalyst-- I reconnected with an old friend (11/11/61) who is in the same line of creative work I am. Although this relationship upset my husband I did not give it up. I realize that this person is a friend and not a suitable candidate for husband/father (we have three children) but I cannot convince my husband that is the case, even though I have been faithful to him and the other relationship is somewhat tenuous. Is it that my husband is being super controlling or am I not being honest? If I give up my friend will my husband go back to drinking? The astrology books are not very reassuring on the Neptune in the seventh house thing, so I wonder if I am stuck with relationship weirdness no matter what, or if I would just be better off being a nun. My birthday is 4/4/65, at 6 AM.
Thank you--
"Doomed by Neptune"
Dear "Doomed by Neptune"
First of all your Neptune may be in your seventh house but it is well aspected to your natal Saturn and Pluto and yes it does oppose your Moon and Jupiter as well but don't lose sight of the fact that the Moon is well aspsected to both Saturn and Pluto as well. This should give you an overall positive skew on your relationship capability. Now you are right regarding partners being of an escapist nature but that doesn't mean that you can't have a successful relationship and that your current partner can't pull his act together. This set up can be highly creative sexually if that's where the energy is put and obviously you and your husband did just that, the result being your three children. With your Neptune Jupiter opposition and of course Jupiter being in your first house you can tend to overreact a bit and may not be totally honest with yourself or your partner at an emotional level. I feel that your past acquaintance is really not the issue as you do not match up to him well. As a matter of fact it is more like a sister brother connection and a strained one at that. Your Scorpio friend falls in an area of your chart that deals with dead end projects. As for your husband your comparison was okay but sorrow does prevail especially with regard to his drinking problem. With his natal Neptune in an adverse position to his natal Uranus I believe that he could fall off the wagon from time to time. However, it probably won't be the result of your friendship with your Scorpio friend. Your Scorpio however should only be someone that you deal with as a direct result of work and nothing more. If you want your marriage to work you and your husband will have to work together in order to keep his problem under control. If he can't handle it and continually gets inebriated you will have to make a decision based on what's best for you and your children. Your husband falls in an area of your chart that deals with children and partying and that is probably how things started out some 15 years ago however times have changed and he's going to have to pull up his socks or expect to lose his family.
Eugenia
Dear Eugenia,
In January of 97 I became romantically involved with my teacher (his birth date:Aug.19,1950). He is married (his wife born Aug.10,1955). He had assured me that there was no romantic involvement with her and that he loved me, that the only reason he didn't leave her was because of his child, that theirs was a "business relationship." I believed him and loved him deeply, but recently found out that he still was having relations occasionally with her. He said that all along his feelings had been conflicting, that he didn't want to give her up, so when I said I wanted fidelity, he dumped me. His wife told me she plans to "punish" him. I am hurting terribly because I still love him very much. It is also going to hurt my studies, because he won't allow me in his classes any more. He had also gotten me a job at one of the places where he works. The day he ended the relationship (because I "pushed" him too far, he said), May 3rd (this year), I was angry and said I wanted to quit that job, so he cancelled my involvement in a joint project we were working on, which hurt my students as well as myself. I feel so hurt I cry all the time and wish I could die. I wish I had never said anything, and that our relationship had continued. Now I feel like my whole life is falling apart, because everything I did revolved around him. I have been to the counselor at school; she has been sympathetic but has no suggestions. He calls me sometimes, he says because he is sorry he hurt me, but he offers me no hope. He said he still doesn't know how he feels about anything, that I should do nothing and let time work things out. But I feel like I need to make some decisions about my life. Can you please help me? I don't even know what question to ask you, but perhaps you have some ideas. Thank you for reading my letter. It feels better just to know that you have "listened."
Sincerely,
Teachers Pet
Dear Teachers Pet
What were you thinking? Your comparison with your philandering professor wasn't all that great, for that matter his comparison with his wife wasn't earth shattering either. You are both dealing with a man who is full of himself and very capable of having secret affairs with women who are vulnerable or na?ve enough to believe his dribble. You unfortunately have been going through a very rough couple of years where love and relationships are concerned. Although your chart does denote that you could have someone from your past waltz back into your life, I certainly hope that you have enough will power to say no this time around. You should feel sorry for this man and even sorrier for his wife, whom I must say has also gone through similar transits to you regarding her relationship. I must mention that your chart and his wife's have an uncanny resemblance. I know that you are confused, hurting and you just want to be happy but strength and control will be necessary. I think that the more you back away from this man, the more he will want to come closer. It's hard to control what's in your heart especially when you are as sensitive and loving as you are. You were looking for that white knight who could stimulate you mentally and physically and we all know how hard that is to find. Please try to put this relationship in perspective and move on with your life. You will be in a high cycle for love and romance in June and I would hate to see you waste it on this man. You deserve better and I know that if you get out and join groups or organizations that you believe in you will meet like-minded people who can turn your crank. You match up well to those born under the signs Virgo, Capricorn and Pisces.
Eugenia
