We've all experienced times of conflict and personal struggle. Times when the assistance and advice of a friend always seemed to lend comfort and ease the burden. Have you ever wondered what it would be like if that friend was one of the world's most revered astrologers, with over 25 years of experience?
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I have decided to put more time and energy into my research. It’s been a pleasure to answer your emails and to help you through some of life’s tough journeys. Everyone who has participated in my Dear Eugenia column has enriched my life and I hope I have improved yours as well.
For those of you who wish to contribute birth data to my research, please enter your information to my medical astrology research listed on my home page. This research is explicitly dealing with cancer and mental health – addiction illness. The focus is on early diagnosis and preventative medicine.
I want to stress how important it is to submit complete and accurate birth data – the time and place of birth.
The following are our 'Dear Eugenia' letters archive:
Dear Eugenia,
Many years ago I consulted an astrologer about my chances of marrying happily, and he replied, "Do you really want to know?" He seemed so evasive and reluctant that I didn't push it. A year or two later I met my husband (9/17/53) and we have been together for nearly fifteen years. I have since learned a little about astrology and decided that the reason the astrologer was so reticent is that I have Neptune in Scorpio in the seventh house. I think this has manifested mostly in my husband's struggles with alcohol; about three years ago he finally made a major effort and got his drinking under control. Unfortunately at the same time-- I wonder if it was the catalyst-- I reconnected with an old friend (11/11/61) who is in the same line of creative work I am. Although this relationship upset my husband I did not give it up. I realize that this person is a friend and not a suitable candidate for husband/father (we have three children) but I cannot convince my husband that is the case, even though I have been faithful to him and the other relationship is somewhat tenuous. Is it that my husband is being super controlling or am I not being honest? If I give up my friend will my husband go back to drinking? The astrology books are not very reassuring on the Neptune in the seventh house thing, so I wonder if I am stuck with relationship weirdness no matter what, or if I would just be better off being a nun. My birthday is 4/4/65, at 6 AM.
Thank you--
"Doomed by Neptune"
Dear "Doomed by Neptune"
First of all your Neptune may be in your seventh house but it is well aspected to your natal Saturn and Pluto and yes it does oppose your Moon and Jupiter as well but don't lose sight of the fact that the Moon is well aspsected to both Saturn and Pluto as well. This should give you an overall positive skew on your relationship capability. Now you are right regarding partners being of an escapist nature but that doesn't mean that you can't have a successful relationship and that your current partner can't pull his act together. This set up can be highly creative sexually if that's where the energy is put and obviously you and your husband did just that, the result being your three children. With your Neptune Jupiter opposition and of course Jupiter being in your first house you can tend to overreact a bit and may not be totally honest with yourself or your partner at an emotional level. I feel that your past acquaintance is really not the issue as you do not match up to him well. As a matter of fact it is more like a sister brother connection and a strained one at that. Your Scorpio friend falls in an area of your chart that deals with dead end projects. As for your husband your comparison was okay but sorrow does prevail especially with regard to his drinking problem. With his natal Neptune in an adverse position to his natal Uranus I believe that he could fall off the wagon from time to time. However, it probably won't be the result of your friendship with your Scorpio friend. Your Scorpio however should only be someone that you deal with as a direct result of work and nothing more. If you want your marriage to work you and your husband will have to work together in order to keep his problem under control. If he can't handle it and continually gets inebriated you will have to make a decision based on what's best for you and your children. Your husband falls in an area of your chart that deals with children and partying and that is probably how things started out some 15 years ago however times have changed and he's going to have to pull up his socks or expect to lose his family.
Eugenia
Dear Eugenia
I have separated from my husband after 14 years of marriage and I have been seeing another man for 15 months now. My ex was very jealous and controlling and his selfishness killed all the love I had for him. He was born on November 5 1955.
My present lover was a longtime acquaintance and we got together as my marriage was ending. He was born on September 26 1966.
I have always had a strong attraction to this man from the first time I saw him and my ex could see it somehow and it caused a lot of frictions in our marriage. Nothing ever happened between the other man and me until I became desperately unhappy and sought him in the last months of my marriage. He brought back laughter and joy into my life and I feel happy in his company. He is divorced and has a teenage daughter. We have a very discreet relationship for many reasons but now I wish we could take it to another level.
Could you please tell me if this relationship will lead to a commitment or if there is another man for me in my future? I am very careful whom I mingle with because I have two children that I want to keep safe. My present boyfriend has known them from birth and has been good and caring towards them.
Hoping to hear from you soon.
Thank you.
Marie
Dear Marie
Firstly, kudos to you for having the strength and courage to move on and getting away from a controlling and unloving marriage and for thinking of your children first.
The comparison with your ex showed signs of both mental and physical abuse that you and your children shouldn't be subjected to. His possessive obsession at an emotional level is something he was born with and shows clearly in his chart. In short he needs professional help to overcome this problem however he is the personality type that probably would never agree to that sort of therapy.
Your current relationship is not the best or most suitable match up for you long-term and is probably much better kept as a family friend. Unfortunately according to your astrological comparison with him there is evidence that he has the potential to be emotionally deceptive with you. I do believe that you have some karma with this man however and that it is likely he has served his purpose. Your chart indicates that you are in a high cycle regarding love this year and that it is important for you to get out and meet new people, however if you are tied up too tightly with your Libra man you aren't likely to experiment with potential partners. You match up well to those born under the signs Aries, Leo, Virgo, Libra and Aquarius. Should you want to give this relationship more time your next favorable cycle for love and romance will begin late next year and continue through the first three quarters of 2009.
Eugenia
Dear Eugenia,
Thank you for providing this service for self-exploration. These days my computer is on auto pilot to your I Ching feature; although he has proven insightful, I would like the chance of experiencing the human element of your web site.Here goes.... My husband and I are both Aries, and have totally different personality traits. I was born 24/03/1960, at 2 AM. My husband birth date is 22/03/1961, I do not know his time of birth. I am energetic, motivated, outgoing, competitive; he is passive, laid back, doesn't like change. When we were married in 1981, we moved over 1000 miles away from our birthplace and families. Since 1981 to now, we have experienced a lot of life, from our youngest son being diagnosed with Cancer, to loosing my father. Right now, we are in a position to re-evaluate our career paths, and move closer to home. In the small northern community that we live in, the health and education systems are in shambles. We decided last March to let our eldest son have the opportunity to go to a boarding school. He loved it, and will be returning this September. For me, it is very hard to have my 15-year-old son living away from home. I have taken the initiative of "doing" a resume for my husband and have sent it out to several places... and telling him after the fact. He is now getting responses for interviews. You see, the company that he works for is re-evaluating their economic viability, and have closed down operations for one year, while still maintaining all staffing levels. We are in limbo. He came home from work the other night, and said there was a job posting up for a job he would really like to apply for at this "Limbo Company", and that he liked to be "comfortable". I need change, and to be with my family... Does this mean DIVORCE COURT!!!
Regards,
Limbo Land
Dear Limbo Land
Just because you are born under the same sun sign does not mean that you have to be alike. A personalized chart is like your thumbprint. There are several differences that stand out between you and your husband's charts even without having his birth time. I wouldn't be surprised however if he were born around the noon hour giving him a Cancer ascendant. If this is the case I suspect that he will be moving along with you and not staying put. This could be because he gets an interesting offer from one of the companies you sent his resume to or because he does not get the job at the Limbo Company. You match up too well to have divorce enter the picture, as I'm sure you are well aware. Changes are apparent and the opportunity to make a move looks good. I'd be putting your house on the market if you own it or looking for a place to live closer to your birth place come October with hopes of selling your house or making your move sometime before the end of the year.
Eugenia
