We've all experienced times of conflict and personal struggle. Times when the assistance and advice of a friend always seemed to lend comfort and ease the burden. Have you ever wondered what it would be like if that friend was one of the world's most revered astrologers, with over 25 years of experience?
This service is no longer available.
I have decided to put more time and energy into my research. It’s been a pleasure to answer your emails and to help you through some of life’s tough journeys. Everyone who has participated in my Dear Eugenia column has enriched my life and I hope I have improved yours as well.
For those of you who wish to contribute birth data to my research, please enter your information to my medical astrology research listed on my home page. This research is explicitly dealing with cancer and mental health – addiction illness. The focus is on early diagnosis and preventative medicine.
I want to stress how important it is to submit complete and accurate birth data – the time and place of birth.
The following are our 'Dear Eugenia' letters archive:
Dear Eugenia,
I was born on October 17th 1946 at 6:20 PM in Toronto. The last few years have been difficult but I've tried to remain hopeful that things will work out. But lately I've read some astrology sites that state this is one of the best times my sign will have for the next 12 years. Since I have no job and little money, few friends, no social life and I'm married to a man I have to take care of because his fondness for alcohol has left him with brain damage, I find it hard to believe these are good times. If it doesn't get any better than this I don't know how I'll cope. Are these supposed to be good times for me?
Tired.
Dear Tired.
None of us consist of just our Sun Sign and this is where astrology can be misinterpreted. You have actually had several years of tough times and although things are starting to improve you still have some problems to deal with. The first thing you have to do is to take the initiative to make the necessary changes in order to improve your life. Even if you feel that you don't want to get into the work force at this time the possibility to do so is present over this next year however you have to do the legwork. If you really don't want to work you should at least volunteer or join an organization you believe in so that you can get out and have some sort of social life and support system happening. Jupiter has just moved into an area of your chart that usually indicates a move or favorable change in your home. You are also in a high cycle where relationships are concerned and if you are sick and tired of taking care of your ailing husband it may be time to institutionalize him. He made the choice to drink himself into oblivion and it's time you stopped being the martyr. You still have a lot of living to do and as long as you sit in the situation that you are in nothing will change. Astrologically speaking I can tell you what you should be doing and when the time is right but you have to take the initiative and make it happen. Get moving girl; you've paid your dues.
Eugenia
Dear Eugenia,
I am going through a breakup in my marriage of 15 years. It has been a very rocky marriage with control and mistrust on my part, and dishonesty and no loyalty on her part, and we haven't been friends in a long time, to name the most major problems. We were in turmoil for 4 weeks before we had an argument and then have been separated for 5 weeks now and have really had some nasty times. Some of the things she has said are very hurtful, and I don't know what is true and what is not. I think that most men would not stick around to hear the things she has been saying, but for some reason I can't seem to stop loving her and wanting her to come back to build on what we have or had. I have heard that she hasn't been in love with me in years- she was just "settling" or "getting by". I do now recognize some signs of her feeling this way, but I have a hard time seeing it being as much as she says. When we weren't mad at each other, there was always holding hands, cuddling, kissing, that type thing that after 15 years a lot of partners don't do as much as we did. I have really come to the realization that my mistrust and controlling manners have to change no matter what- and we're very misplaced with her. Basically, I realize that she came home to me every night, and now she doesn't- that's all that matters to me now. She wants some space to figure out who she is and has sometimes said things that give me hope (false hope is how she words it). She has also said several times that it is over and she just wants to move on. I can't seem to get my head into "moving on" as every one tells me to. I also can't seem to leave her alone and give her space. I am obsessed with trying to talk to her to start becoming friends- but it just makes her angrier and turns into a nasty fight sometimes. I don't know how to control my urge to not leave her alone because my whole life seems to be just falling apart without her beside me.
Can you guide me into a more secure or comfortable place?
Sorry I don't know the time of her or my birth. Her day was May 2/60 and mine is Sept. 11/66.
Virgo
Dear Virgo
The comparison does indicate trouble. There is a lack of trust and communication along with deception and anger. Uncertainty will always be a problem between the two of you regardless of whether you stay together or not. You need to let go. You have a good chart and if you can only realize that you were totally mismatched regarding your values and hers you might be able to move on. You match up to people born under the signs Taurus (not her - I'll explain later), Cancer, Virgo, Scorpio, Capricorn and Pisces. She may be a Taurus but only by Sun sign. She has her natal Mercury and Venus in the sign Aries and this sign does not match up to you at all. Mercury and Venus represent the way she thinks and communicates along with her morals, ethics and Venus represent the way she loves etc. What actually drew you together was the fact that you both have your Moon in the sign Cancer but that isn't enough to make a relationship work. She is erratic and can change her mind very rapidly. She wants to have fun and she needs freedom to come and go as she pleases. You need companionship, trust and someone who wants to be with you all the time. This connection just won't work that way. We are who we are and as much as either one of you may want to change I fear that the same problems will continually surface. You are headed toward lots of changes and you have to wrap your head around that and accept the inevitable. Should she even entertain the thought of getting back together it wouldn't be long before she would want to move on again. Let go and start anew. I believe that she has decided to do just that. The only time I see a possible reconciliation is this fall however as I mentioned before - should you get back together it would only be for a short period of time be
Dear Eugenia,
I hope very much that you can help me. I was born on 26 December 1963 at 3.35 AM and my ex-boyfriend was born 10 January 1967. We have been together for four or so years and he has just told me that we are finished. He has always been a 'closed book' as far as feelings go or showing them at least. He told me that while he misses me and 90% of the time he is happy with me, there are certain characteristics of mine that he cannot stand. The main being, and I admit this - I tend to overindulge in alcohol on occasions. He feels that I have a problem with this and will not tolerate it any longer.
We don't live together and I have always felt that I was the one giving a lot more than him. We live in a small country town where gossip is rife and unfortunately a lot of people have nothing more to do than embellish.My childhood was odd and I have recently lost my brother and I feel that these things influence my behavior at times.
I asked him if I had lost him forever and he replied that we both had a lot of thinking do.
Please help me. I am so lost and sad and while I believe in taking responsibility for my actions - is there any chance for us?
EllyMM
Dear EllyMM
Your comparison was certainly good enough to make it work however I worry that too much has happened for him to turn back. Your chart indicates that you are and have been going through a period of over indulgence that does need to be stopped. I believe that he is truly concerned for you and just can't take how you react when under the influence. It's time to pull your act together and hope that it's not too late to win him back. You do have a transit moving through your chart until the Spring of next year that indicates that people from your past are likely to come back into your life but you will have to work hard for it to be him. He will be experiencing a similar transit so the possibility if you take all the right steps is present. I suggest that you stop indulging all together in order to save yourself a lot of grief in the future.
Eugenia
