We've all experienced times of conflict and personal struggle. Times when the assistance and advice of a friend always seemed to lend comfort and ease the burden. Have you ever wondered what it would be like if that friend was one of the world's most revered astrologers, with over 25 years of experience?
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I have decided to put more time and energy into my research. It’s been a pleasure to answer your emails and to help you through some of life’s tough journeys. Everyone who has participated in my Dear Eugenia column has enriched my life and I hope I have improved yours as well.
For those of you who wish to contribute birth data to my research, please enter your information to my medical astrology research listed on my home page. This research is explicitly dealing with cancer and mental health – addiction illness. The focus is on early diagnosis and preventative medicine.
I want to stress how important it is to submit complete and accurate birth data – the time and place of birth.
The following are our 'Dear Eugenia' letters archive:
Hi Eugenia
Here is my problem. My husband of 17 years (September 19,1959.) He has been visiting my ex-girlfriend, I tell him I don't like it, he's says he's doing nothing wrong that they are just friends and nothing more. This causes me pain and our marriage isn't that great these days. I was born Feb.15 1960 at 1:39pm. I'm wondering if I should stay with him or leave. We have two children and I really want to work this out and not feel so insecure. Thanks for any suggestions.
Third Wheel
Dear Third Wheel
Your comparison with your husband is adequate however you are moving into a period of time that could take the relationship either way. The unfortunate thing is that your husband has broken the code of ethics that two people usually have with one another and that is sticking together on issues that concern relatives and friends. If you and your girlfriend no longer see one another there must be a good reason for that and therefore he should stand behind your decision not to see her and do the same. You did not give me her birth data so it's difficult for me to be sure that nothing is going on between the two of them however according to his chart I do believe that he has been confused and questioning his life so he could be planning to make changes in his person life within the year. This is a difficult situation for you to be in and I feel that if you care about this man and your family that you suggest counseling or at least start talking about the options available if you want this marriage to work. You are both heading toward your second half-life Saturn, him this year and you next. This is usually a time when decisions and changes are made. As I mentioned the comparison is okay but as a couple you both need to work at this relationship much harder if you really want it to survive.
Eugenia
Dear Eugenia,
I have been in love with my husband for a very long time. Our relationship has weathered many ups and downs but the past few years have been particularly difficult. He has been unfaithful and is currently unable to make a decision between staying and recommitting to our marriage or not. I was born on april29/55 (@ 5:55pm). He is a Scorpio (November 17/55). With all that we have been through (on a variety of levels) my heart still hopes for an honest chance at happiness. I can't bear this pain.
Together or Not
Dear Together or Not
I can understand your position. As a Taurus with a strong Cancer and Scorpio influence you don't really relish disruptions of any kind especially when it has to do with your home, family and security. The comparison with your husband was okay but it did lack some pizzazz. He may be a Scorpio but when it comes to love and romance he has his natal Venus in the sign Sagittarius and that is usually an indication that married or not he will always be a bachelor at heart. I think it's time to set him free and get on with your life. You have a lot to offer and can still find love and romance with someone more worthy of your loyalty, dedication and devotion. You need to start doing the activities you used to enjoy, get back into the swing of things. It may be frightening at first but you will be fine. Keep in mind that it can be extremely lonely living with someone who pays little attention to you. You deserve more and you can have it. Your chart indicates that it's time to focus on yourself and your future. I feel that if your husband saw you as a challenge he may want to reconcile, however if I were you, I'd think long and hard before I'd jump into that situation again. You match up well to those born under the signs Taurus, Cancer, Scorpio, Capricorn and Pisces. Take note that the Scorpio in your husband's chart is what initially attracted you, not the Sagittarius. Another Scorpio with his natal Venus in Scorpio, Capricorn or Virgo would probably match up quite nicely.
Eugenia
Dear Eugenia,
Many years ago I consulted an astrologer about my chances of marrying happily, and he replied, "Do you really want to know?" He seemed so evasive and reluctant that I didn't push it. A year or two later I met my husband (9/17/53) and we have been together for nearly fifteen years. I have since learned a little about astrology and decided that the reason the astrologer was so reticent is that I have Neptune in Scorpio in the seventh house. I think this has manifested mostly in my husband's struggles with alcohol; about three years ago he finally made a major effort and got his drinking under control. Unfortunately at the same time-- I wonder if it was the catalyst-- I reconnected with an old friend (11/11/61) who is in the same line of creative work I am. Although this relationship upset my husband I did not give it up. I realize that this person is a friend and not a suitable candidate for husband/father (we have three children) but I cannot convince my husband that is the case, even though I have been faithful to him and the other relationship is somewhat tenuous. Is it that my husband is being super controlling or am I not being honest? If I give up my friend will my husband go back to drinking? The astrology books are not very reassuring on the Neptune in the seventh house thing, so I wonder if I am stuck with relationship weirdness no matter what, or if I would just be better off being a nun. My birthday is 4/4/65, at 6 AM.
Thank you--
"Doomed by Neptune"
Dear "Doomed by Neptune"
First of all your Neptune may be in your seventh house but it is well aspected to your natal Saturn and Pluto and yes it does oppose your Moon and Jupiter as well but don't lose sight of the fact that the Moon is well aspsected to both Saturn and Pluto as well. This should give you an overall positive skew on your relationship capability. Now you are right regarding partners being of an escapist nature but that doesn't mean that you can't have a successful relationship and that your current partner can't pull his act together. This set up can be highly creative sexually if that's where the energy is put and obviously you and your husband did just that, the result being your three children. With your Neptune Jupiter opposition and of course Jupiter being in your first house you can tend to overreact a bit and may not be totally honest with yourself or your partner at an emotional level. I feel that your past acquaintance is really not the issue as you do not match up to him well. As a matter of fact it is more like a sister brother connection and a strained one at that. Your Scorpio friend falls in an area of your chart that deals with dead end projects. As for your husband your comparison was okay but sorrow does prevail especially with regard to his drinking problem. With his natal Neptune in an adverse position to his natal Uranus I believe that he could fall off the wagon from time to time. However, it probably won't be the result of your friendship with your Scorpio friend. Your Scorpio however should only be someone that you deal with as a direct result of work and nothing more. If you want your marriage to work you and your husband will have to work together in order to keep his problem under control. If he can't handle it and continually gets inebriated you will have to make a decision based on what's best for you and your children. Your husband falls in an area of your chart that deals with children and partying and that is probably how things started out some 15 years ago however times have changed and he's going to have to pull up his socks or expect to lose his family.
Eugenia
