We've all experienced times of conflict and personal struggle. Times when the assistance and advice of a friend always seemed to lend comfort and ease the burden. Have you ever wondered what it would be like if that friend was one of the world's most revered astrologers, with over 25 years of experience?
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I have decided to put more time and energy into my research. It’s been a pleasure to answer your emails and to help you through some of life’s tough journeys. Everyone who has participated in my Dear Eugenia column has enriched my life and I hope I have improved yours as well.
For those of you who wish to contribute birth data to my research, please enter your information to my medical astrology research listed on my home page. This research is explicitly dealing with cancer and mental health – addiction illness. The focus is on early diagnosis and preventative medicine.
I want to stress how important it is to submit complete and accurate birth data – the time and place of birth.
The following are our 'Dear Eugenia' letters archive:
Dear Eugenia
Where to start. First of all I guess that I should tell you that I met my husband and I have been with my husband for 20 years. Married for 17. Beautiful children. I have been very unhappy for a longtime. My husband is verbally, mentally, and worst of all physically abusive. I live everyday in fear, and am always trying to make everything happy and peaceful. I am always living planning the next step of the day out to make sure that it is going to make him happy. I am the bread winner in the family, I have to take care of all of the other responsibilities to, cooking, cleaning, bills, children, laundry, and even making his phone calls for his job etc for him. I should mention that he does work as well, but that is his only responsibility. I feel like an awful person for what I am about to tell you, but I have gotten to the point of being desperate for an answer. About 9 years ago, I met our now best friend. He has always been so nice to me. He is a very patient kind person. He is also in a relationship (not married, but do live together) and has wonderful children. His partner is a very angry person and yells constantly at her children it is so sad. I am very close with his children and love them very much. I have always had feelings for him, however never had said anything. We have always sat up and talked for hours on end when he has come over. About 2 1/2 years ago we were sitting and talking and it came out that we both had feelings for each other. I have never been so shocked, I never would have guessed. He told me at the time that he didn't know what to do, as he couldn't imagine waking up and not being in the same house as his children, that they were his life, and I think that is wonderful. We seem to go in spurts of calling each other, and then periods of not calling each other. However, neither one of us seem to be able to talk about our feelings. We have kissed, and it has been truly wonderful. But I do feel very guilty. I cannot stop thinking about him, I think of him when I wake up, through the day, when I go to bed. It's driving me crazy. I wonder if you can tell me what he is thinking. What he feels for me? My birthday is October 9, 1971, his is April 18, 1977, and my husband's is September 7, 1970. If you could please offer me any insight I would be truly grateful.
Libra
Dear Libra
First of all I want to deal with your relationship with your husband. You don't have one, nor do you need him in your life. You are only teaching your children that it is okay for a man to be abusive to a woman and that in it self is wrong and should have been enough for you to move on with your kids long ago.
It appears to me the only reason you are considering doing so now is because you have someone else in your life but that is not the way to start off a good relationship. I understand why you are attracted to your friend but the comparison although superior to the one with your husband it still isn't great. It is apparent that the connection with your friend is Karmic and I believe his debt is to help you remove yourself and your children from the miserable situation you have put up with for too long however after that it will be time for you to move on and start over.
You do not need your husband so cut your losses and get on with your life. You've already wasted too much time and the damage that the kids have endured watching you being abused are probably insurmountable at this point.
Your chart indicates that you probably should have made your move last year but it's still not too late if you take action immediately. As for your love life - it will pick up during the second half of this year once you have rid yourself of the dead weight you've been living with for so many years. What were you thinking when you married this man - it is seldom I see two people stay together as long as the two of you have when you
Dear Eugenia,
I am at a standstill in my life. For 2 1/2 years I dated a man born 10/3/60 10:30AM. He and I grew up in the same community and town. We had not seen each other in 15 years and were "fixed up" by mutual friends. The relationship had gone through many ups and downs, at times splitting for weeks and months at a time. I recently completed my M Ed. and needed to stay focused on my goals. He has been a toll collector for 18 years and has a 16-year-old son from a previous relationship that left him raising a son alone and with really crappy hours, the kid is both spoiled and neglected. I have tried nearly everything possible to stay with him, but once I was able to commit to the relationship, his inability to make decisions and be more conscientious of money and time began to widdle away at our relationship. I loved and still love him. In the last year we have lost a child, he has cheated on me twice, and basically lost sight of what was once a strong and vibrant respect for one another. I caught him both times and his wealthy family thinks that he is weak, and that I am too good for him and a tad bit too controlling. We dreamed of many things together. I helped him find and fix up his dream home. Prior to his cheating we were planning a family and life together. I know that I have difficulty letting go in a relationship and wonder if I will ever find someone with whom to spend my life. I thought he was my soul mate. I thought the balance of his laid back approach to life and my ability to solve problems and make things happen would culminate into marriage. We are both seeing other people 3 months after the split and recently were drawn together by finances and we ended up making love. I am confused and tormented by what could have but can never be. We often said that if he didn't have his son we would already have been married. He is the kind of man that can't be left alone, and I refused to live with him until he got a grip of his son's law breaking/disrespectful behavior (I have a 9 year old) before living together and being a family. We have had quite a dramatic relationship. The disrespect was making me miserable. Do you think he could my soul mate? Am I foolish to believe he could ever evolve into a stronger man and be happy with a good woman like me? I can't believe I still want him after everything we have been through. My head says run, but my heart says "maybe someday" My DOB is 9/11/61 at 11:59 PM. Will I ever find a soul mate, and does he exist? I am dating, but unable to find anyone who makes me feel hope.
An empty - Gypsyheart
Dear Gypsyheart
I think you should focus your time and energy on your son, your own home, travel, self-improvement and socializing. You have latched on to a man who has no backbone and although he probably is an attractive package due to his family prominence you are best not to waste any more time on the prospect of spending the rest of your life with him. Your comparison indicates that this man will bring you sorrow. The past three years this mans chart has experienced all sorts of uncertainties and weaknesses that have resulted in his sons need to do whatever it takes to get some attention. This man is not likely to get his act together in the near future therefore you should get on with your life and forget about what might have been. Your comparison with him was not that great and I know that you can do much better. You do not need a weak man but instead one strong enough to balance your need to control. Although the sign Scorpio is definitely a sign that draws you, this particular Scorpio is not the one. You also match up well to those born under the signs Aries, Taurus and Gemini. You should always run a comparison through our compatibility service before you let someone new capture your heart. Your chart indicates that if you get out and do things that you enjoy over the course of th
Dear Eugenia,
When I was a child I seemed to be able to do everything without effort. I was a success at most anything I tried. Then my parents separated when I was a junior in high school and things just fell apart for me. I feel like a loser. People tell me I am a strong person, and I try to be, but I feel that somehow I am wearing a mask and pretending. I don't feel strong. I have flunked out of college and am working in a retail job that isn't challenging. I tried taking a couple classes, but dropped out.
My relationships are really messed up. I have been seeing and living with a wonderful person for the past two years. He loves me and is wonderful to me, but I don't feel that I love him the way I should. I checked our romance compatibility with your site and found that I was what he was looking for (79 percent), but he was only 51% for me. I am afraid to say anything to him about this because I don't want to hurt his feelings. In the compatibility report it said that I could only survive in a balanced and harmonious atmosphere. I don't want that to be true.
I also keep thinking about someone who I loved in the past. This was not a safe relationship as he kept leaving me, but I feel like I was more in love with him although the compatibility report looks similar to the relationship I'm in now. He did come back and said he loved me, but I was too afraid. Now I'm thinking I might have made a mistake.
I am afraid to be alone, but I'm also afraid to be married because I don't want to end up hating someone I once loved. Is there anything in my chart that can explain any of this and is there any hope for my future? Is either relationship something I should pursue or should I just try it on my own?
I was born on September 27, 1980 at 12:47 pm. The guy I am with now was born on June 13, 1978 and my past love on May 17, 1981 in the late morning or early afternoon.
I would appreciate any help you could give me, please!
Undecided
Dear Undecided
You are moving into a period of make it or break it where relationships are concerned and you are also in a period where past lovers can come back into your life. Although both comparisons are okay I fear that your motives are wrong. You are going through a period of uncertainty and you shouldn't choose to be with either right now. You will be in a much better position at the end of 2002 and the summer and fall of 2003. Until that time you should probably get to know yourself a little better. Discover what other partners have to offer and play the field a little. You need more experience before you should settle down.
Eugenia
