We've all experienced times of conflict and personal struggle. Times when the assistance and advice of a friend always seemed to lend comfort and ease the burden. Have you ever wondered what it would be like if that friend was one of the world's most revered astrologers, with over 25 years of experience?
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I have decided to put more time and energy into my research. It’s been a pleasure to answer your emails and to help you through some of life’s tough journeys. Everyone who has participated in my Dear Eugenia column has enriched my life and I hope I have improved yours as well.
For those of you who wish to contribute birth data to my research, please enter your information to my medical astrology research listed on my home page. This research is explicitly dealing with cancer and mental health – addiction illness. The focus is on early diagnosis and preventative medicine.
I want to stress how important it is to submit complete and accurate birth data – the time and place of birth.
The following are our 'Dear Eugenia' letters archive:
Dear Eugenia,
I have two babies, a 36-month-old boy and a 20-month old girl. Their father has been an addiction of mine for four years. Just when I think I have finally made it to a place in my life where I can let go of him; I am pregnant again. I am torn between continuing in this one-sided relationship for the sake of our children, who adore him, while having another baby; or not; and disconnecting from him completely. I was born 7/6/65 at 5:30 EST and he was born 1/20/63 at 8:30p.m. PST. I fear that if I don?t walk away soon, I never will; but I feel like it is better the devil you know, then the devil you don?t know. I would really appreciate some guidance. I am afraid I won?t make the best decision for my two babies. He isn?t very kind to me; he is very abusive, distrustful and threatening. It has taken a long time and a lot of distance to break down, a little, his control of my emotions and feelings of self worth. I really need some ones insight into his character strengths and weaknesses and what is in store for our future.
Please respond
Dear Please respond
I can see your dilemma. I call this set up meeting your messiah. In other words you are so connected to this man you can?t help yourself and yet he is not good for you. The comparison was quite something, filled with love, hate, passion, deception, sorrow and so on. It is apparent that when he is feeling guilty, because he has done something that he probably shouldn?t, like cheats on you, he becomes abusive to cover it up. It is important that you don?t raise your children in this setting or they will grow up thinking that this is the way people should treat one another. I do not believe that your love is one-sided but I do believe that this man is not good for you. You are coming into a period that will be even more difficult where relationships are concerned. You can use this period to take further abuse from him or you can use this period to get out on your own with your children and start a new life. Neither will be easy but the later will certainly lead to a better future for you and your children. Opportunities for you to meet someone else are apparent and I believe you should do just that. It will help you forget about your abusive partner. Your chart also indicates that you are not likely to be with just one partner throughout your life. There is also evidence in your chart that you do attract men who will try to control and confine you. I suggest that you have an astrological evaluation done prior to giving your heart to the next man you want to become intimate with. Build on friendship first and you?ll stand a better chance of developing a long lasting union. You are coming into a high cycle where work and money are concerned. I feel confident that if you put your energy into your work, your children, your new home and meeting new friends and lovers you will find that your life will unfold quite nicely as we go into the year 2001. It sometimes helps to make a list of all the reasons that you feel that you should not be with your ex. Like the things he brings out in you that you don?t like and the things he does that you can?t live with. Every time he tries to contact you or you want to contact him pull out your list and read it just to remind yourself why you left him.
Eugenia
Dear Eugenia:
I have been married for six years. For most of that time, our sex life has been practically nonexistent, even though we seem to be quite compatible based on our charts. This is my fault, really, as early on I lost my desire to have sex with him; in fact, I am turned off by his touch. I've never told him this because I don't want to hurt him, but, obviously, the "sex" issue has caused some major discord in our marriage. I have tried to rekindle my passion, but I haven't had any success. I know the problem is not physical, as I often have sexual dreams and fantasize about other men (but I've never cheated). If I am unable to get past this, it most surely will lead to divorce. I was born 11/20/71 at 6:50 a.m., my husband was born 5/6/65, (time unknown). Thank you for your advice.
Passionless Wife
Dear Passionless Wife
I don?t really see your comparison as being all that great regarding love. It lacks in areas essential to building a happy and loving relationship. It appears to be more like a brother sister connection that is definitely not built on passion. Your chart indicates that you are coming into a period that brings opportunities for you to meet someone who knocks you off your feet. This could lead to a secret affair if you aren?t out of your current situation. I suggest that if you don?t want this to happen and you truly want to try to rekindle your relationship, that you start communicating with your husband honestly about your feelings and let him know what?s lacking in your marriage. I am a believer that any relationship can work if both people are willing to put in the effort. However, unfortunately I have found that in most cases when it doesn?t work there is a lack of communication and it?s often quite one-sided with regards to who puts what into the marriage. In your case I feel that honesty and straightforwardness will be required. Although this may hurt your husbands feelings initially, if you are living in a loveless marriage I think he would agree that getting help or splitting up would be preferable to the nonexistent connection that you have right now.
Eugenia
Dear Eugenia,
I am in a long distance relationship with a man 5 hours from me (Oct. 24, 1979) and I am wondering how we can make it work or if it really could work since I don't have the time (nor money) to waste on unworthy causes.
I feel very strongly about him. We've met twice & the first time we were both out of sorts. Last time we had a great time! I've never had an online relationship but I do understand that a lot of work is involved. Commitment, sacrifices & compromising are the top 3 things I can think of. I'm afraid that I won't be able to provide my part of the bargain as well as he could. I'm afraid that after some time we'll be too tired to continue this relationship & feel that we have -really- wasted our time & money. I haven't been able to find someone as compatible with me as he in my own town. I've been single for over a year now. I'm afraid I might only be interested in him because he's interested in me too, just because I've been single for so long (I don't think that's very truthful though).
The only way that an online relationship can work is if both partners plan on being together down the line. We're not dating yet but we both want to move back to BC in the near future. I have so many fears. What about my education? My career? What if we're only compatible with distance between us, & then we rip each other to shreds once we're together-together? ARGH!!
Could you offer me a bit of astrological advice? I do know that all but 2 of his & my astro houses are located under the same sign. Any words of wisdom would be really appreciated!
Wrapped up
Dear Wrapped up
The comparison was okay. Keep in mind that in order to have a relationship work it takes work. People always think that if they fall in love that's all it takes but unfortunately a relationship probably takes more time, effort and work then anything else you do in life. I believe that he is someone who can help you achieve some of your dreams, hopes and wishes, however that doesn't mean that you will end up together forever. More so than having a long term or everlasting union a relationship should be based on how much you learn from one another, enjoy one another and compliment one another. You have time to kill right now as the next time you are in a really high cycle for love is next year. As for now you should be enjoying whatever time you do get to spend with one another. Just because you live a distance doesn't mean that you can't do things on the cheap. You'd probably spend just as much cash staying at home as you would staying at his place or vise versa. If you really enjoy one another's company you'll find ways to spend more time together while you discover each other's likes, dislikes, needs and desires. Don't be impatient love and relationships take time.
Eugenia
