We've all experienced times of conflict and personal struggle. Times when the assistance and advice of a friend always seemed to lend comfort and ease the burden. Have you ever wondered what it would be like if that friend was one of the world's most revered astrologers, with over 25 years of experience?
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I have decided to put more time and energy into my research. It’s been a pleasure to answer your emails and to help you through some of life’s tough journeys. Everyone who has participated in my Dear Eugenia column has enriched my life and I hope I have improved yours as well.
For those of you who wish to contribute birth data to my research, please enter your information to my medical astrology research listed on my home page. This research is explicitly dealing with cancer and mental health – addiction illness. The focus is on early diagnosis and preventative medicine.
I want to stress how important it is to submit complete and accurate birth data – the time and place of birth.
The following are our 'Dear Eugenia' letters archive:
Dear Eugenia,
I have two babies, a 36-month-old boy and a 20-month old girl. Their father has been an addiction of mine for four years. Just when I think I have finally made it to a place in my life where I can let go of him; I am pregnant again. I am torn between continuing in this one-sided relationship for the sake of our children, who adore him, while having another baby; or not; and disconnecting from him completely. I was born 7/6/65 at 5:30 EST and he was born 1/20/63 at 8:30p.m. PST. I fear that if I don?t walk away soon, I never will; but I feel like it is better the devil you know, then the devil you don?t know. I would really appreciate some guidance. I am afraid I won?t make the best decision for my two babies. He isn?t very kind to me; he is very abusive, distrustful and threatening. It has taken a long time and a lot of distance to break down, a little, his control of my emotions and feelings of self worth. I really need some ones insight into his character strengths and weaknesses and what is in store for our future.
Please respond
Dear Please respond
I can see your dilemma. I call this set up meeting your messiah. In other words you are so connected to this man you can?t help yourself and yet he is not good for you. The comparison was quite something, filled with love, hate, passion, deception, sorrow and so on. It is apparent that when he is feeling guilty, because he has done something that he probably shouldn?t, like cheats on you, he becomes abusive to cover it up. It is important that you don?t raise your children in this setting or they will grow up thinking that this is the way people should treat one another. I do not believe that your love is one-sided but I do believe that this man is not good for you. You are coming into a period that will be even more difficult where relationships are concerned. You can use this period to take further abuse from him or you can use this period to get out on your own with your children and start a new life. Neither will be easy but the later will certainly lead to a better future for you and your children. Opportunities for you to meet someone else are apparent and I believe you should do just that. It will help you forget about your abusive partner. Your chart also indicates that you are not likely to be with just one partner throughout your life. There is also evidence in your chart that you do attract men who will try to control and confine you. I suggest that you have an astrological evaluation done prior to giving your heart to the next man you want to become intimate with. Build on friendship first and you?ll stand a better chance of developing a long lasting union. You are coming into a high cycle where work and money are concerned. I feel confident that if you put your energy into your work, your children, your new home and meeting new friends and lovers you will find that your life will unfold quite nicely as we go into the year 2001. It sometimes helps to make a list of all the reasons that you feel that you should not be with your ex. Like the things he brings out in you that you don?t like and the things he does that you can?t live with. Every time he tries to contact you or you want to contact him pull out your list and read it just to remind yourself why you left him.
Eugenia
Dear Eugenia
My parents divorced before I went to primary school and then I lived with my father. Since I was small, I was bullied. My mother worked in another city and did not care about me. My father treated me this way because he was remarried and had other children. My mother told me that my grandmother did not treat her well when she was small. This was why she did not know how to show her love to me. I was brought up under this environment and became very lonely. I was afraid to have contact with people. I had a few boyfriends and none of them worked out. I wanted so much my own family but every time I got hurt. With no parents to love, other people looked down on me. When I was at work, it did not turn out okay and I was always faced with many problems. I did not know how to deal with people and felt lost. After so many failures, I've lost my confidence totally. Now I have this boyfriend for over a year. He is a good person but he has a very stubborn character and that I can hardly accept. He always says something to hurt me. He needs someone to take care of him while I also long for someone who can look after me. I doubt if we can be a happy couple but I trust his integrity and like his family who treat me well. Now I just lost my job and had a fight with him.
My mother came back to Shanghai and bought an apartment. Now I am living with her but my mother does not care what I am doing. If you didn't know, you would think I am so lucky with a good apartment and a nice looking face. But in fact I have nothing, no family and no career. My life doesn't have any meaning. Is my life supposed to be this way? Did I do something wrong in my last life?
I was born on October 21, 1972 at around 3:30 am. My boyfriend was born on July 8, 1973 at 5 o'clock (I am not sure how accurate this is).
Hope you can give me some guidance. Thank you.
LOST
Dear LOST
Don't be so hard on yourself and your family. Your chart does show some problems with family however you must realize that the grass always appears to be greener on the other side of the fence. In other words this is an obstacle that you can and will overcome. You can learn from the experience you have had. Although you aren't positive what it would be like to have a loving family it isn't hard to know what you consider a loving family to be. Your boyfriend does match up quite nicely to your chart however there is potential for arguing. I do believe that when you love someone and you truly care about him that you will inevitably have disagreements. There is no apparent deception in your comparison only the fact that you will both overreact at times and this has probably resulted in your breakup. Please call him and try to work out your differences. You said that his family is kind and good to you, therefore you have a base to learn from. If you follow what has worked for them it will work for you as well.
Eugenia
Dear Eugenia,
I am very much in love and hoping to marry a Leo, (8/11/55) that I have known for 6 years now. We dated for three years, took one and a half years off, and are back together in a stronger, more passionate bond than ever before. He is a very affectionate man, and I feel in many ways my perfect match and soul mate. When I'm with him I'm ecstatic and the separations are still torture.We have had a long distance relationship for the last year, as was the case early on as well, but at that point neither of us was ready (or able) to move.
Recently I've been considering moving across the country to be with this man. He has said repeatedly that he wants to live with me though he is not sure about "marriage" per se. Perhaps it was his Leo nature --he loves women and says so-- but he was not monogamous with me in our first three years together, a fact I learned only this year. Now I have less trust in him, though I still love him desperately. I want to marry this man, even though he hurt me.
Is this man capable of loving only one woman? Unfortunately I do not have a birth time for him. I am concerned that if I move my life to be with him, I might get hurt, since I was shocked to learn that my prince was not who I thought he was in Round one. He has stated it was only a "phase" and he is serious about me now. If you can give me any insights into our future based on his and my chart, I would appreciate it. I was born February 11, 1974, at 3:30 AM. Thanks Eugenia,
Polar Opposites
Dear Polar Opposites
The comparison between you and your Leo partner was certainly enticing, engaging and intriguing however it also showed signs of sorrow, deception and disillusionment. Now I'm not trying to deter you from following your heart because I feel you are going to do so anyway and that you probably have to experience this relationship for some karmic reason. I must however tell you that your Leo falls in an area of your chart that deals with dead end projects and that the length of time spent with one another may not be all that long. He is going through many changes. He doesn't really know what he wants and will bounce back and forth between wanting to be single and wanting to be married. If you make the effort to move and he still isn't willing to marry you should be asking yourself why not. You were born with your natal Neptune adversely aspecting your natal Mercury and this usually represents a person who is gullible, easily deceived or blind to the defects of others. Before you make a move I suggest that you have a job to go to first. Look out for your own interests and be sure that regardless of what he does you are self-sufficient.
Eugenia
