We've all experienced times of conflict and personal struggle. Times when the assistance and advice of a friend always seemed to lend comfort and ease the burden. Have you ever wondered what it would be like if that friend was one of the world's most revered astrologers, with over 25 years of experience?
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I have decided to put more time and energy into my research. It’s been a pleasure to answer your emails and to help you through some of life’s tough journeys. Everyone who has participated in my Dear Eugenia column has enriched my life and I hope I have improved yours as well.
For those of you who wish to contribute birth data to my research, please enter your information to my medical astrology research listed on my home page. This research is explicitly dealing with cancer and mental health – addiction illness. The focus is on early diagnosis and preventative medicine.
I want to stress how important it is to submit complete and accurate birth data – the time and place of birth.
The following are our 'Dear Eugenia' letters archive:
Hi Eugenia
I'm considering divorce... my problem is my husband (Sept. 19, 1959.) still considers visiting a single woman, secretly, I always find out, and it hurts me, but he doesn't seem to care, cause as he puts in he isn't doing anything wrong. Well I feel betrayed. I also feel he has other secrets that he doesn't share with me. I could be wrong but I don't really know. My birthday is Feb. 15,1960. Hers is Feb. 26 1960. I kind of do believe they are friends but it still doesn't sit well with me nor do our children like it... Do you think that a divorce is the right thing for me to initiate at this time.. I seem to be running out of options.. Cause deep down I don't want a divorce I want my husband to appreciate & love me.
Thanks for listening............
Feeling left out
Hi Feeling left out
This is a very sticky situation. He matches up to you a little bit better than he does to his Pisces friend. His comparison with her does show some sorrow and on the other side his comparison with you does not indicate deception. I do believe that he is attracted to her and enjoys her company as a friend but I don't believe that he has taken it further. I feel however that she might try. With that in mind it does put you in a very difficult situation. If you nag him you will only make him move towards her. You may want to suggest however that anyone that is a friend of his should also be a friend to the family and have him invite her over for lunch or dinner. This way you get yourself and the children into the loop. At least from that position you can monitor the situation and protect your interests wisely. If he isn't interested in doing so you may want to play his game and find a male friend to spend some time with. After all what's good for the goose is good for the gander. Be smart about the situation. I believe you love him and that your family means enough to you to try to hold it together. If he truly believes in friendship with the opposite sex he should not have a problem with you having male companionship as well. I must caution you however that this can turn into a very dangerous situation especially if you happen to actually meet someone who fills the needs that your husband is obviously not fulfilling. The other approach will be for your children to voice their concerns and how they feel about being left out and that he should be spending the time he gives to his Pisces friend with them.
Eugenia
Dear Eugenia:
My birth date is July 1, 1949 1:00 am, my husband is May 18, 1946.
I am going through a very emotional time in my life. My mother (to whom I was very close died in April) which caused a major family fallout which resulted in a lot of our family not talking to each other and breaking ties completely. Prior to and during this time I feel that my marriage has come to an end. We have been married for 33 years and have been drifting apart for some time. We have very little communication what so ever, and any that we have is mostly anger and aggression. I also feel that there has been someone else in my husband's life. I am confused as to why he doesn't just walk away from the marriage and yet if I had to confront him I have learned from past experiences that he would just lie anyway so I don't see the point, as he is very abusive verbally. My biggest problem in leaving the marriage is financial security, as I do not have the confidence that I could survive on my own. (My childhood was very poor and insecure and I am sure this has a lot to do with my current insecurities especially financial) I have gained a lot of weight with the stress of everything going on in my life which does not help my self esteem and my work is suffering as I cannot concentrate on things at work. I cannot see a future for myself on my own yet my health is suffering daily from staying in this relationship as I cannot understand why I have stayed in this emotional abusive situation for so long. Do you see a brighter future for me and some self-improvements that could help me have the confidence to walk away. And is there a possible suitable companion that could give me the loving caring relationship that I dream of is possible in this life. Can you please advise?
Desperate.
Dear Desperate.
Life is like a lit match. It burns rapidly and then it's gone. For all the time that people waste in situations that are unbearable I have little sympathy. You are the master of your own will and destiny and its time for you to get a grip and move on. You will be in a better position next year to start that diet, join a fitness group, start swimming and so forth. For now you have to take care of business and that means call up your real estate agent if you own your home and force the issue to put it on the market. Split your assets down the middle and start to make plans for the future. Life is simple; it's people who make it complex. You've been clinging to something that is doing nothing but bringing you down. Where you should have been excelling professionally this year you've been vacillating about your personal life. You will have a positive cycle professionally between October and February and you should do whatever you can to focus on your job, career and advancement. If you work hard you will do just fine. During the last half of next year and the first half of 2002 you will be in a high cycle romantically. If you are still with your husband you will miss that opportunity. Your game plan should be focus on work and selling assets in order to split what you have together. Next get into shape during the spring and summer of next year followed by new friends and lovers. You match up well to those born under the signs Aries, Gemini, Leo, Libra, Sagittarius and Aquarius.
Eugenia
Dear Eugenia,
I have a problem. I am sixteen years old, and I feel like I am forty. My mother is very sick, and I must take care of her, as well as attend school and achieve honor role. I work part time, but the income just isn't always enough to make ends meet. Lately my marks at school have been slipping... the stress is really getting to me, but I need good marks in order to get a scholarship, so I can get a decent education.
My problem is that my mother is mentally ill. She has the mental capacity of a three year old. I do have older brothers and sisters, but the responsibility of taking care of my mum has been put on my shoulders.
I really need some advice on my situation. A reply would be much appreciated. I was born August 18, 1982 at 7:27 PM.
Thank you,
Moly
Hi Moly
Your situation is not great and you have all the right in the world to feel sorry for yourself. You must put added pressure on your siblings in order to make them help out. It is their duty to do so. I suggest that you do consider talking to your mother's doctor regarding your options of a nursing home. I fear that if you don't get some support from family members that you may find yourself working full time and putting your education on hold and that would be a shame. Please write back and tell me more about your situation. Where is your father and do any of your siblings still live at home. What are their situations regarding age, marriage, position to help.
Eugenia
Dear Eugenia,
Thank you for answering my letter. You asked for more information about my family: my father passed away, when I was a little girl... too little to remember him, and after him, my mother never married again. I have eight older brothers and sisters, and though none of them live at home, they all live in the same city. They have their own problems - I am not blaming them for not helping me out... I just wish that they were a little more compassionate about my situation.
As for school, I haven't told any of my teachers about my present situation... although I am thinking that it might help quite a bit. Maybe there are some programs or something outside of school, so I can get a full time job, to support my family.
Well, I really don't know what to say... I am really starting to feel the stress, and none of my brothers or sisters are willing to help me out. I have tried to reason with them... but they have their own lives, and their own problems. I think part of it has to do with the fact, that none of them get along with my mother, they just don't have the patience. Only two of my siblings are married, the rest are either full time workers, or full time students.
Regarding the nursing home issue, I just don't feel right about it, no matter which way I look at it. I love my mum way too much to let anything happen to her. I suppose it would probably be better in the long run, but I am really hesitant about that. I am making it sound as though I have no support. In truth, a very special friend at school has been helping me out. We are in a Social Justice group together (that's how we met), and he's the only other person that knows about my situation. He sometimes comes over to take care of my mum when I am working, and he always has a shoulder to cry on. I just feel kind of bad, because he is such a good friend to me, and I have nothing to offer him except problems.
Thank you once again,
Moly
Hi Moly
You are offering your friend lots just by being a friend. You should talk to your teachers they may be able to help you out or at least have suggestions as to how you can continue to study and deal with your home situation. You can't give up your education to take care of your mom. She wouldn't want you to. There would still be the issue of how you would take c
