We've all experienced times of conflict and personal struggle. Times when the assistance and advice of a friend always seemed to lend comfort and ease the burden. Have you ever wondered what it would be like if that friend was one of the world's most revered astrologers, with over 25 years of experience?
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I have decided to put more time and energy into my research. It’s been a pleasure to answer your emails and to help you through some of life’s tough journeys. Everyone who has participated in my Dear Eugenia column has enriched my life and I hope I have improved yours as well.
For those of you who wish to contribute birth data to my research, please enter your information to my medical astrology research listed on my home page. This research is explicitly dealing with cancer and mental health – addiction illness. The focus is on early diagnosis and preventative medicine.
I want to stress how important it is to submit complete and accurate birth data – the time and place of birth.
The following are our 'Dear Eugenia' letters archive:
Hi Eugenia
I'm considering divorce... my problem is my husband (Sept. 19, 1959.) still considers visiting a single woman, secretly, I always find out, and it hurts me, but he doesn't seem to care, cause as he puts in he isn't doing anything wrong. Well I feel betrayed. I also feel he has other secrets that he doesn't share with me. I could be wrong but I don't really know. My birthday is Feb. 15,1960. Hers is Feb. 26 1960. I kind of do believe they are friends but it still doesn't sit well with me nor do our children like it... Do you think that a divorce is the right thing for me to initiate at this time.. I seem to be running out of options.. Cause deep down I don't want a divorce I want my husband to appreciate & love me.
Thanks for listening............
Feeling left out
Hi Feeling left out
This is a very sticky situation. He matches up to you a little bit better than he does to his Pisces friend. His comparison with her does show some sorrow and on the other side his comparison with you does not indicate deception. I do believe that he is attracted to her and enjoys her company as a friend but I don't believe that he has taken it further. I feel however that she might try. With that in mind it does put you in a very difficult situation. If you nag him you will only make him move towards her. You may want to suggest however that anyone that is a friend of his should also be a friend to the family and have him invite her over for lunch or dinner. This way you get yourself and the children into the loop. At least from that position you can monitor the situation and protect your interests wisely. If he isn't interested in doing so you may want to play his game and find a male friend to spend some time with. After all what's good for the goose is good for the gander. Be smart about the situation. I believe you love him and that your family means enough to you to try to hold it together. If he truly believes in friendship with the opposite sex he should not have a problem with you having male companionship as well. I must caution you however that this can turn into a very dangerous situation especially if you happen to actually meet someone who fills the needs that your husband is obviously not fulfilling. The other approach will be for your children to voice their concerns and how they feel about being left out and that he should be spending the time he gives to his Pisces friend with them.
Eugenia
Dear Eugenia,
I have dated. I have been engaged a few times but never married (I think I always took marriage too seriously -- and never could promise to do all that marriage entails). I had a loving relationship with a man who had a terminal illness, who died in '95. I have always kept the door open in my heart that I might find a life-long partner, but now I wonder: should I shut the door on this option? I'm not afraid of being alone. I am afraid of nurturing false hope in myself. I was born January 6, 1953, at 5:45 am.
Thank you.
Capricorn
Hi Capricorn
You should never close the door on love, romance, marriage, partnership etc. One of the reasons why you have gone the route but never crossed the line when it came to marriage is due to having your natal Uranus in an area of your chart that deals with relationships opposite your Sun in an area of your chart that deals with your personal outlook. This has probably caused you or your partners throughout life to back away or have a change of heart at the last minute. With transiting Saturn moving into that area of your chart there has never been a better time to find love and get serious then now. Also with your Moon in the sign Virgo it isn't unusual for you to find love or get into a serious relationship during the second half of life. In your case you are moving into a high cycle regarding love right now and you should be out meeting new people. This particular transit can also bring someone from your past back into your life so perhaps if there is someone you still think about you should readdress this relationship. In the past the timing was probably wrong with this person. This is a great year for you creatively, educationally and where growth is concerned. You should be expanding your circle of friends, getting involved in discussions or courses that will alter your philosophy, attitude, lifestyle and outlook. You are going through changes and that is part of the reason you are feeling somewhat concerned or restless about finding love or backing away from it completely. You match up well to those born under the signs Aries, Gemini, early Cancer, Virgo, Sagittarius, Capricorn and Pisces.
Eugenia
Dear Eugenia,
I am going through a breakup in my marriage of 15 years. It has been a very rocky marriage with control and mistrust on my part, and dishonesty and no loyalty on her part, and we haven't been friends in a long time, to name the most major problems. We were in turmoil for 4 weeks before we had an argument and then have been separated for 5 weeks now and have really had some nasty times. Some of the things she has said are very hurtful, and I don't know what is true and what is not. I think that most men would not stick around to hear the things she has been saying, but for some reason I can't seem to stop loving her and wanting her to come back to build on what we have or had. I have heard that she hasn't been in love with me in years- she was just "settling" or "getting by". I do now recognize some signs of her feeling this way, but I have a hard time seeing it being as much as she says. When we weren't mad at each other, there was always holding hands, cuddling, kissing, that type thing that after 15 years a lot of partners don't do as much as we did. I have really come to the realization that my mistrust and controlling manners have to change no matter what- and we're very misplaced with her. Basically, I realize that she came home to me every night, and now she doesn't- that's all that matters to me now. She wants some space to figure out who she is and has sometimes said things that give me hope (false hope is how she words it). She has also said several times that it is over and she just wants to move on. I can't seem to get my head into "moving on" as every one tells me to. I also can't seem to leave her alone and give her space. I am obsessed with trying to talk to her to start becoming friends- but it just makes her angrier and turns into a nasty fight sometimes. I don't know how to control my urge to not leave her alone because my whole life seems to be just falling apart without her beside me.
Can you guide me into a more secure or comfortable place?
Sorry I don't know the time of her or my birth. Her day was May 2/60 and mine is Sept. 11/66.
Virgo
Dear Virgo
The comparison does indicate trouble. There is a lack of trust and communication along with deception and anger. Uncertainty will always be a problem between the two of you regardless of whether you stay together or not. You need to let go. You have a good chart and if you can only realize that you were totally mismatched regarding your values and hers you might be able to move on. You match up to people born under the signs Taurus (not her - I'll explain later), Cancer, Virgo, Scorpio, Capricorn and Pisces. She may be a Taurus but only by Sun sign. She has her natal Mercury and Venus in the sign Aries and this sign does not match up to you at all. Mercury and Venus represent the way she thinks and communicates along with her morals, ethics and Venus represent the way she loves etc. What actually drew you together was the fact that you both have your Moon in the sign Cancer but that isn't enough to make a relationship work. She is erratic and can change her mind very rapidly. She wants to have fun and she needs freedom to come and go as she pleases. You need companionship, trust and someone who wants to be with you all the time. This connection just won't work that way. We are who we are and as much as either one of you may want to change I fear that the same problems will continually surface. You are headed toward lots of changes and you have to wrap your head around that and accept the inevitable. Should she even entertain the thought of getting back together it wouldn't be long before she would want to move on again. Let go and start anew. I believe that she has decided to do just that. The only time I see a possible reconciliation is this fall however as I mentioned before - should you get back together it would only be for a short period of time be
