We've all experienced times of conflict and personal struggle. Times when the assistance and advice of a friend always seemed to lend comfort and ease the burden. Have you ever wondered what it would be like if that friend was one of the world's most revered astrologers, with over 25 years of experience?
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I have decided to put more time and energy into my research. It’s been a pleasure to answer your emails and to help you through some of life’s tough journeys. Everyone who has participated in my Dear Eugenia column has enriched my life and I hope I have improved yours as well.
For those of you who wish to contribute birth data to my research, please enter your information to my medical astrology research listed on my home page. This research is explicitly dealing with cancer and mental health – addiction illness. The focus is on early diagnosis and preventative medicine.
I want to stress how important it is to submit complete and accurate birth data – the time and place of birth.
The following are our 'Dear Eugenia' letters archive:
Dear Eugenia,
I am in love with a guy that 'fired' me and dumped me all in the same day. He was attempting to teach me how to drive as a trucker. We remained friends for 2 weeks. I am trying to get into a truck driving school, I asked him if I could borrow one of his vehicles, the school is out of state and I have no vehicle of my own. He is so boiling mad and fuming that I even asked that question! He is not my friend anymore, he says, that I was using him, which I was not. But yet, he would like to know how I am doing in school, and also said that he is still quite fond of me. He will not even consider any kind of friendship with me until after he is over being mad at me. He wants no contact from me, but said to email him or call him when I am in school. He said that after I am in school, we would take it from there. Am I getting mixed signals or what? We were together for 5 weeks on the road; not understanding how you can fire someone you weren't even paying.....I have no idea how long it will take him to get over being mad at me; or if there is a chance of winning back his friendship. I was born on 6/22/60 at 10:32 am. He was born 9/8/61. Do I hold any hope of ever regaining his friendship and maybe a relationship again? Thank you.
Please Respond
Trucker
Dear Trucker
The comparison certainly had some hot connections. It is apparent that emotionally and physically you do hook up but mentally there will be problems. Arguments and misunderstandings can be expected. I believe that this could turn out to be one of those love/hate relationships where you can't live with or without the other person. Back up, slow down and start all over. When you finish your trucker's course contact him and try to keep everything open, honest and amiable. If you can do so you may stand a chance at making this one work. If you find that it's just too difficult don't despair. You will be in a high cycle for love next summer. You match up well to those born under the signs Cancer, Virgo, Scorpio, Capricorn and Pisces.
Eugenia
Dear Eugenia,
I am going through a breakup in my marriage of 15 years. It has been a very rocky marriage with control and mistrust on my part, and dishonesty and no loyalty on her part, and we haven't been friends in a long time, to name the most major problems. We were in turmoil for 4 weeks before we had an argument and then have been separated for 5 weeks now and have really had some nasty times. Some of the things she has said are very hurtful, and I don't know what is true and what is not. I think that most men would not stick around to hear the things she has been saying, but for some reason I can't seem to stop loving her and wanting her to come back to build on what we have or had. I have heard that she hasn't been in love with me in years- she was just "settling" or "getting by". I do now recognize some signs of her feeling this way, but I have a hard time seeing it being as much as she says. When we weren't mad at each other, there was always holding hands, cuddling, kissing, that type thing that after 15 years a lot of partners don't do as much as we did. I have really come to the realization that my mistrust and controlling manners have to change no matter what- and we're very misplaced with her. Basically, I realize that she came home to me every night, and now she doesn't- that's all that matters to me now. She wants some space to figure out who she is and has sometimes said things that give me hope (false hope is how she words it). She has also said several times that it is over and she just wants to move on. I can't seem to get my head into "moving on" as every one tells me to. I also can't seem to leave her alone and give her space. I am obsessed with trying to talk to her to start becoming friends- but it just makes her angrier and turns into a nasty fight sometimes. I don't know how to control my urge to not leave her alone because my whole life seems to be just falling apart without her beside me.
Can you guide me into a more secure or comfortable place?
Sorry I don't know the time of her or my birth. Her day was May 2/60 and mine is Sept. 11/66.
Virgo
Dear Virgo
The comparison does indicate trouble. There is a lack of trust and communication along with deception and anger. Uncertainty will always be a problem between the two of you regardless of whether you stay together or not. You need to let go. You have a good chart and if you can only realize that you were totally mismatched regarding your values and hers you might be able to move on. You match up to people born under the signs Taurus (not her - I'll explain later), Cancer, Virgo, Scorpio, Capricorn and Pisces. She may be a Taurus but only by Sun sign. She has her natal Mercury and Venus in the sign Aries and this sign does not match up to you at all. Mercury and Venus represent the way she thinks and communicates along with her morals, ethics and Venus represent the way she loves etc. What actually drew you together was the fact that you both have your Moon in the sign Cancer but that isn't enough to make a relationship work. She is erratic and can change her mind very rapidly. She wants to have fun and she needs freedom to come and go as she pleases. You need companionship, trust and someone who wants to be with you all the time. This connection just won't work that way. We are who we are and as much as either one of you may want to change I fear that the same problems will continually surface. You are headed toward lots of changes and you have to wrap your head around that and accept the inevitable. Should she even entertain the thought of getting back together it wouldn't be long before she would want to move on again. Let go and start anew. I believe that she has decided to do just that. The only time I see a possible reconciliation is this fall however as I mentioned before - should you get back together it would only be for a short period of time be
Hello again Eugenia,
I wrote you last year in May, telling you about the problems with my husband (born January 31 1959, 2.50am) and my situation with the immigration status in US. I tried to follow your advice and go with him to marriage counseling, but the things were not very good. He didn't want to go first, and when he went, he said that the counseling it doesn't work for him because nobody will come to tell him that he is wrong, when he knows that he is right.
In December, last year, I found 4 email accounts full of emails back and forth with a lot of women. Many of them were very in love with him. He promised them marriage and a good situation in US. A women from Mexico called at the house and she was very upset when she found out that he is married. Nobody from his women in Internet knew that he is married. He recognized everything he did, but in the same time he doesn't want to be with me anymore. Its like: "I don't want you because you know too many things about me now."
Eugenia, I tried everything with this man, I tried to play by the rules in this marriage, but he deceived me so many times that I don't trust him anymore. He lied to me from the beginning, he controls me in every way you can think about it, and he abuses me mentally very hard. My main problem is the immigration situation in this moment; he keeps me stuck in the house, like a slave. From more than 6 months, I am trying to apply for getting a legal status in the country, together with my daughter, with a law who defends women and children who live in abusive relationships with their husbands, but because I don't have money to pay a lawyer (my husband controls all the finances), I was not able to find somebody to help me apply, even if I went to all the places where you can receive free legal services. I wanted to leave him many times in the last year, since I wrote you, but I don't have where to go and what to do. I cannot work and make a living together with my daughter without him. The situation is very difficult and I am really desperate.
My first question is if you see something about this situation in my chart, and when do you think that I will be able to resolve something?
Trying to find more things about my husband activity in Internet, going in chats and other sites where I found out he was all the time, I met a man, 2 months ago. He is psychologist and professor to a university, not very close to my city. Since February, we chat and emailed each other each day. We talked on the phone few times. We have good time together. We laugh a lot, and he is very considerate and nice...He was born October 15, 1957, at 12.26pm.He understood my situation, and we decided to take it slow because of my situation. He wants to meet me soon.
Sometimes I feel bad thinking that now I am doing the same thing my husband did with his secret life in Internet, but in the same time, I feel that I need somebody in my life to get through all this mess that I have to live, and mentally and emotionally I don't feel connected with my husband anymore. I don't think that he deserves my love and my respect after all the garbage he put on our life together.
Do I have any future with this new man in my life? I had so many bad experiences with my 2 divorces, now the 3rd husband is a real jerk, my horrible situation with the legal status and everything, and I am really afraid to suffer again. I don't want you to believe that I am jumping in a new relationship when I am still in such a mess.... but this guy seems to bring a lot of light in my miserable life....
Thank you a lot for all your help,
gabituca
Hi grabituca
You are taking the wrong approach by doing the same thing you are accusing your husband of doing. Think about your daughter not your physical needs right now. The man you have met on the internet does not match up to you at all in fact I do
