We've all experienced times of conflict and personal struggle. Times when the assistance and advice of a friend always seemed to lend comfort and ease the burden. Have you ever wondered what it would be like if that friend was one of the world's most revered astrologers, with over 25 years of experience?
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I have decided to put more time and energy into my research. It’s been a pleasure to answer your emails and to help you through some of life’s tough journeys. Everyone who has participated in my Dear Eugenia column has enriched my life and I hope I have improved yours as well.
For those of you who wish to contribute birth data to my research, please enter your information to my medical astrology research listed on my home page. This research is explicitly dealing with cancer and mental health – addiction illness. The focus is on early diagnosis and preventative medicine.
I want to stress how important it is to submit complete and accurate birth data – the time and place of birth.
The following are our 'Dear Eugenia' letters archive:
Dear Eugenia,
I am really lost in my life and I don't know what to do. I was born on 03/21/1967 at 1:00am. Two years ago I left my country to live in Mexico together with my daughter (06/16/1989-7:26pm). We lived there for almost one year and we were happy. After some time I met a men who lives in US and we got married. Now we are living in US but the situation is very difficult for me and my daughter. Because my husband (01/31/1959-2:50 am) is only permanent resident here, we have to wait for the immigration process between 5 and 7 years. Meanwhile my daughter and I cannot have a legal status and it was impossible to find other ways to be legal. This means that I cannot work legally, I am 100% dependent of my husband, I feel very lonely and depressed. We don't have family around, we don't have friends. My husband is a very difficult man, grumpy, without any sense of humor, the macho style, stingy, he wants somebody to take care of him, to cook for him, to respect him, he needs a woman that can replace his mother. I caught him right after the wedding, last year, by mistake, that he receives a lot of emails from a lot of women, very loving emails...you know...I was very hurt and upset for a long time. He lived alone for many years and he told me that he was looking for a relationship and even after he said to everybody that he is married and happy now, these women are still writing to him and he doesn't know what to do with them. Can you believe that? Because I didn't...his behavior with my daughter is very bad. He is very rude with her. She is a very nice teenager, brilliant at school, very smart. Everybody loves her except him. She is doing all the time a big effort to please him, but nothing seems to be right for him. He recognizes that she is very intelligent but always he says that she is not doing enough and he puts a lot of pressure on her. I tried hundreds of times to explain to him that his behavior is wrong, but he still thinks he is perfect and his skills like a parent are perfect. In my opinion he doesn't have any skills and he doesn't want to learn anyway.
He was very sick in the last months, he had open heart surgery, and I helped him a lot in his recovery...he was not able to do anything by himself...Even if he recognizes that me and my daughter were very close to him during all this hard time that he had, his behavior doesn't change...is the same grumpy, rude and without manners person.
My daughter and I?are thinking to leave him, but the problem is that we don't have anywhere to go. We cannot return to Mexico, because we don't have anything there anymore, and is the same situation for my country too.
I would not like to divorce (it will be the third one in my life), I really want to work out this relationship, I really want to help him learn how to be a nice person, I really want to have a nice family...He tells me that he loves me, but it seems to be so difficult for him to show that...
What do you see in my horoscope regarding this situation? Do you think that I will be able to find the way to fix all this problems? I don't want to see my daughter unhappy...I don't want to be unhappy too... what do you think about that?
Thank you very much,?
gabituca
Dear gabituca
The astrological comparison that you have with your husband really is quite good. There is some sorrow in an area that deals with children. I believe that his problem is that he was used to living alone and although he craved having a woman in his life a ready made family was not really what he wanted. He fell in love with you and your daughter was something he had to tolerate. It isn?t that he has a bad comparison with her ? in fact it is actually quite favorable however the problem is he can?t wrap his head around the idea of having to deal with the normal life changes that having a teenager around the house brings with it. For you i
Dear Eugenia,
The year 2000 came with fireworks, just not the fireworks I was expecting. After 5 years in a relationship with the same man, two and half of which we were married, he indicated January 2,2000 that he was not sure if he was "in love" with me. This was perhaps not a surprise to me, as we had been having conflicts over the last year due to my attending grad school and we had attended counseling, per my request. After much debating, I decided to leave our house on Jan 8, 2000 and allow him some "time to think." It was during that time that I found out that there was another woman with whom he was involved. I have always been very naive, too naive I suppose! He was my first boyfriend and, therefore, my only experience. Since my discovery, I have endured many unpleasant moments, which I would rather not retell. A month after we were separated, I decided that I could not continue with a relationship which was based on a lie, and so I filed for divorce. And so here I stand, filled with anger and pain. Feeling guilty as perhaps the reason why he ended up involving himself with someone else was my fault or my dedication to my career...I don't know whether that is a question that you may be able to answer, but, for my own peace I would like to know. I was born April 4, 1975, at 8:15 a.m. sun sign: Aries; rising sign: Taurus/ He was born November 3, 1971 (unfortunately, don't know what time).
Thank you...
Standing Alone
Dear Standing Alone
Your comparison indicates that you are well suited to one another in most ways. There is however two things that would cause problems in your relationship. The first being deception and the second being an element of anger that appears to be present regarding position and status in society. He may have felt some insecurity regarding your direction professionally, however that is no excuse for him to be with someone else. Especially while you were still together. He should have talked to you about the way he felt long before the situation got out of hand. I doubt however that it would have made much of a difference in the outcome because I feel strongly that your educational pursuits are very important to you, and so they should be. He is approaching his Saturn return and this is making him re-evaluate his past as well as pushing him to make the changes necessary to move forward in a way that he sees most suitable. Unfortunately even if he does want to make amends I feel that you are best to move forward yourself. You should be continuing your studies and pushing to be the best that you can be. There will be other partners in the future who will treat you properly so don't feel so alone. Focus on your educational pursuits because that is what you should be doing right now and when the time is right the white knight will rock your world. You do match up well to the sign Scorpio so don't rule out getting involved with another one.
Eugenia
Dear Eugenia,
My name is Wanda and this is my situation. I am married with two kids. I have been married for one year and eight months. After four months of being married my husband was with another girl. I know this because I came home and I found hickeys on his neck and I went in my bedroom and found a condom on the floor. That's when we started not getting along and I turned to my friends for help and support. I was talking to my husband's friend and we started to get closer and it turned out that we started to see each other every weekend and we started fooling around with each other and now we are seeing each other every now and then. My husband knows because he found us together. I am really in love with my husband's friend and I want to stay with him. But my husband won't let me leave him; he won't let me go. My husband is thirty years old, eight years older than I. We met in 1991 and have been together until this time. I really want to let go of him. I am not in love with him anymore. All I feel for him is friendship. I want to finish school as well and if I stay with him I would not have that opportunity. He is to jealous. We have three kids together 2girls & 1 boy. My daughter seven, son Tyler is six, my youngest is four. I gave up my first daughter at two weeks old because I was only thirteen years of age. Now that I am twenty-two and I want more out of life. I made a mistake getting married at a young age. We got married on August 15 of 98. Could you give me advice about my life. I was born February 5, 1978, at 2:30 PM.
Mixed Up
Dear Mixed Up
Wanda, get a grip. You're twenty-two, you have the rest of your life ahead of you. Get your act together and get out of the situation you're in. You are with a man who obviously doesn't respect you or the marriage vows you took. Although you didn't submit his birth data or that of his friends I'd venture to say by your chart that you have been manipulated for some time with regard to relationships. Take your two children and get out of there before your boys think that it's okay to treat a woman the way you're being treated. Secondly, two wrongs don't make a right. Fooling around with one of your husband's friends is not the answer. You need to get back to basics and sort out your feelings and your life before you get involved with someone else. You are best to seek help first. You should be doing whatever you can to remove the children and yourself from your current situation. There are homes that will take you in with your children if you are abused and if your husband is jealous, refusing to let you leave, and running around on you, that should be enough for you to get help. If you have family to turn to, do so. However, if your parents let you hang out with this man when you were thirteen and he was twenty-one I have a feeling that they won't be much help now. By your chart I can tell you that your home environment is moving into better times but it will take your initiative to turn things around for yourself so get moving. You are in a high cycle where learning is concerned and you should be taking advantage of this. You can apply for social assistance to help you and your kids. You should also look into courses that the government offers to those who want to make life better for them self. You live in a country that gives so much to those-in-need that there is no excuse for anyone to put up with the lifestyle that you are living right now. Get moving girl, and don't look back. You owe that much to your children and to yourself.
Eugenia
