
We've all experienced times of conflict and personal struggle. Times when the assistance and advice of a friend always seemed to lend comfort and ease the burden. Have you ever wondered what it would be like if that friend was one of the world's most revered astrologers, with over 25 years of experience?
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I have decided to put more time and energy into my research. It’s been a pleasure to answer your emails and to help you through some of life’s tough journeys. Everyone who has participated in my Dear Eugenia column has enriched my life and I hope I have improved yours as well.
For those of you who wish to contribute birth data to my research, please enter your information to my medical astrology research listed on my home page. This research is explicitly dealing with cancer and mental health – addiction illness. The focus is on early diagnosis and preventative medicine.
I want to stress how important it is to submit complete and accurate birth data – the time and place of birth.
The following are our 'Dear Eugenia' letters archive:
HI there
I have been friends with a lady for 5 years and we have been dating for 2 years of that time. I am Aries born 31/3/1978 not sure the time and my girlfriend was born 23/9/1971 not sure on time.
About 2 weeks ago she split with me one day and went straight over to another guy the next day. Even though she said she was going to think about us. I found out now that they have been fully seeing each other and she already says she loves him. Why I am writing to you is I was wondering what would have been the better match for her.
He was born on the 24/9/1973 not sure the time. What I have read on the net is a lot and I figured out that I think that she and I would have been a better match for each other than her and this other guy. Could you please tell me up front if a Libra and an Aries are better for each other than a Libra and Libra? Also I have read that Libras are big on flirting and so on and that Libra males are always on the look out for something better if it comes long is this true???
Thank you
Tom
Hi Tom
Sun Sign Astrology is a fun approach to the subject but not that realistic. When you run a comparison you really have to look at all the planets involved etc in order to see how well two people match. In the case of your ex-girlfriend (I might add that she is really a much stronger Virgo) she does happen to match up better to her Libra friend. You my friend are best to put her behind you and start looking forward to the transits you have coming up later this year for love and romance. Even if she leaves her Libra friends and tries to get back together with you it really isn't worth your while. You match up well to the sign Libra however just not to this one. You also do well with Aries, Gemini, Leo, Scorpio, Sagittarius and Aquarius. As for your friend - she is going through a make it or break it period where love is concerned. With regard to her new boyfriend - he is a strong Libra and yes they are flirts and usually looking for someone who is flawless so they do tend to jump to whoever appears to be perfect but in this particular Libras case he has his natal Venus in the sign Scorpio well aspected to his natal Saturn in Cancer and that is usually an indication that he will be devoted to his lover and even possibly jealous and controlling - now that could push her away eventually. As for you - get on with your life and don't look back. She isn't your soul mate.
Eugenia
Dear Eugenia,
I need your advice. My girlfriend left me ten months ago and I have been trying my best since to recover. We were together for about two years. I have been trying to work for personal goals in order to better my life: counseling and I am in the process of applying to law school. I am unable to get over her. I have respected her wishes and left the situation alone but I keep hoping for a second chance. I am constantly plagues by self-doubt. Aside from the heartbreak, I am studying for law school and I am uncertain about what school will accept me and whether to stay in New York City because it constantly reminds me of the past. Am I waiting and hoping in vain for my ex-girlfriend. If you have any advice or insight into the relationship or school please help. Thank you.
Sincerely,
Anthony
Dear Anthony
You didn't mention your ex-girlfriend's date of birth so I can't run a comparison between the two of you or even tell you what she might be thinking but I can tell you that you have been going through a very depressing time with transiting Saturn crossing over your ascendant and this has probably accounted for some of the trouble you are having letting go. Although this transit is still plaguing you there are good things that it can be used for. Education, self-improvement and in general feeling better about you are just a few ways to use up the energy that Saturn brings with it. It is apparent that you are trying to do all of these things and so I feel confident that you will get through it. With your natal Venus in the sign Capricorn well aspected to both your natal Mars and Jupiter I can not imagine you remaining single once the Saturn transit passes as a matter of fact there is evidence that you will probably meet someone through a friend, work, school, while traveling or even over the internet so don't give up. I must tell you however that between now and the summer of next year I really feel that you are best to put your time and effort into your educational pursuits and leave the whole relationship thing until later next year when you will have a better handle on what you really want in a partner. You match up well to those born under the signs Aries, Taurus, Cancer, Virgo, Scorpio and Capricorn. This is not the time to look back or to live in the past and although transiting Saturn can have a tendency to make you do just that it is important that you look forward and work toward your goals. You actually do best with partners who are either a bit older or a bit younger. The partners your own age can be a problem. Regarding making a move - it isn't a bad time to do so but do it for the right reason. Sometimes facing your past is exactly what you need to do in order to get over it and move forward.
Eugenia
Dear Eugenia,
I am going through a breakup in my marriage of 15 years. It has been a very rocky marriage with control and mistrust on my part, and dishonesty and no loyalty on her part, and we haven't been friends in a long time, to name the most major problems. We were in turmoil for 4 weeks before we had an argument and then have been separated for 5 weeks now and have really had some nasty times. Some of the things she has said are very hurtful, and I don't know what is true and what is not. I think that most men would not stick around to hear the things she has been saying, but for some reason I can't seem to stop loving her and wanting her to come back to build on what we have or had. I have heard that she hasn't been in love with me in years- she was just "settling" or "getting by". I do now recognize some signs of her feeling this way, but I have a hard time seeing it being as much as she says. When we weren't mad at each other, there was always holding hands, cuddling, kissing, that type thing that after 15 years a lot of partners don't do as much as we did. I have really come to the realization that my mistrust and controlling manners have to change no matter what- and we're very misplaced with her. Basically, I realize that she came home to me every night, and now she doesn't- that's all that matters to me now. She wants some space to figure out who she is and has sometimes said things that give me hope (false hope is how she words it). She has also said several times that it is over and she just wants to move on. I can't seem to get my head into "moving on" as every one tells me to. I also can't seem to leave her alone and give her space. I am obsessed with trying to talk to her to start becoming friends- but it just makes her angrier and turns into a nasty fight sometimes. I don't know how to control my urge to not leave her alone because my whole life seems to be just falling apart without her beside me.
Can you guide me into a more secure or comfortable place?
Sorry I don't know the time of her or my birth. Her day was May 2/60 and mine is Sept. 11/66.
Virgo
Dear Virgo
The comparison does indicate trouble. There is a lack of trust and communication along with deception and anger. Uncertainty will always be a problem between the two of you regardless of whether you stay together or not. You need to let go. You have a good chart and if you can only realize that you were totally mismatched regarding your values and hers you might be able to move on. You match up to people born under the signs Taurus (not her - I'll explain later), Cancer, Virgo, Scorpio, Capricorn and Pisces. She may be a Taurus but only by Sun sign. She has her natal Mercury and Venus in the sign Aries and this sign does not match up to you at all. Mercury and Venus represent the way she thinks and communicates along with her morals, ethics and Venus represent the way she loves etc. What actually drew you together was the fact that you both have your Moon in the sign Cancer but that isn't enough to make a relationship work. She is erratic and can change her mind very rapidly. She wants to have fun and she needs freedom to come and go as she pleases. You need companionship, trust and someone who wants to be with you all the time. This connection just won't work that way. We are who we are and as much as either one of you may want to change I fear that the same problems will continually surface. You are headed toward lots of changes and you have to wrap your head around that and accept the inevitable. Should she even entertain the thought of getting back together it wouldn't be long before she would want to move on again. Let go and start anew. I believe that she has decided to do just that. The only time I see a possible reconciliation is this fall however as I mentioned before - should you get back together it would only be for a short period of time be