We've all experienced times of conflict and personal struggle. Times when the assistance and advice of a friend always seemed to lend comfort and ease the burden. Have you ever wondered what it would be like if that friend was one of the world's most revered astrologers, with over 25 years of experience?
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I have decided to put more time and energy into my research. It’s been a pleasure to answer your emails and to help you through some of life’s tough journeys. Everyone who has participated in my Dear Eugenia column has enriched my life and I hope I have improved yours as well.
For those of you who wish to contribute birth data to my research, please enter your information to my medical astrology research listed on my home page. This research is explicitly dealing with cancer and mental health – addiction illness. The focus is on early diagnosis and preventative medicine.
I want to stress how important it is to submit complete and accurate birth data – the time and place of birth.
The following are our 'Dear Eugenia' letters archive:
Dear Eugenia,
I am very much in love and hoping to marry a Leo, (8/11/55) that I have known for 6 years now. We dated for three years, took one and a half years off, and are back together in a stronger, more passionate bond than ever before. He is a very affectionate man, and I feel in many ways my perfect match and soul mate. When I'm with him I'm ecstatic and the separations are still torture.We have had a long distance relationship for the last year, as was the case early on as well, but at that point neither of us was ready (or able) to move.
Recently I've been considering moving across the country to be with this man. He has said repeatedly that he wants to live with me though he is not sure about "marriage" per se. Perhaps it was his Leo nature --he loves women and says so-- but he was not monogamous with me in our first three years together, a fact I learned only this year. Now I have less trust in him, though I still love him desperately. I want to marry this man, even though he hurt me.
Is this man capable of loving only one woman? Unfortunately I do not have a birth time for him. I am concerned that if I move my life to be with him, I might get hurt, since I was shocked to learn that my prince was not who I thought he was in Round one. He has stated it was only a "phase" and he is serious about me now. If you can give me any insights into our future based on his and my chart, I would appreciate it. I was born February 11, 1974, at 3:30 AM. Thanks Eugenia,
Polar Opposites
Dear Polar Opposites
The comparison between you and your Leo partner was certainly enticing, engaging and intriguing however it also showed signs of sorrow, deception and disillusionment. Now I'm not trying to deter you from following your heart because I feel you are going to do so anyway and that you probably have to experience this relationship for some karmic reason. I must however tell you that your Leo falls in an area of your chart that deals with dead end projects and that the length of time spent with one another may not be all that long. He is going through many changes. He doesn't really know what he wants and will bounce back and forth between wanting to be single and wanting to be married. If you make the effort to move and he still isn't willing to marry you should be asking yourself why not. You were born with your natal Neptune adversely aspecting your natal Mercury and this usually represents a person who is gullible, easily deceived or blind to the defects of others. Before you make a move I suggest that you have a job to go to first. Look out for your own interests and be sure that regardless of what he does you are self-sufficient.
Eugenia
Dear Eugenia,
I have two babies, a 36-month-old boy and a 20-month old girl. Their father has been an addiction of mine for four years. Just when I think I have finally made it to a place in my life where I can let go of him; I am pregnant again. I am torn between continuing in this one-sided relationship for the sake of our children, who adore him, while having another baby; or not; and disconnecting from him completely. I was born 7/6/65 at 5:30 EST and he was born 1/20/63 at 8:30p.m. PST. I fear that if I don?t walk away soon, I never will; but I feel like it is better the devil you know, then the devil you don?t know. I would really appreciate some guidance. I am afraid I won?t make the best decision for my two babies. He isn?t very kind to me; he is very abusive, distrustful and threatening. It has taken a long time and a lot of distance to break down, a little, his control of my emotions and feelings of self worth. I really need some ones insight into his character strengths and weaknesses and what is in store for our future.
Please respond
Dear Please respond
I can see your dilemma. I call this set up meeting your messiah. In other words you are so connected to this man you can?t help yourself and yet he is not good for you. The comparison was quite something, filled with love, hate, passion, deception, sorrow and so on. It is apparent that when he is feeling guilty, because he has done something that he probably shouldn?t, like cheats on you, he becomes abusive to cover it up. It is important that you don?t raise your children in this setting or they will grow up thinking that this is the way people should treat one another. I do not believe that your love is one-sided but I do believe that this man is not good for you. You are coming into a period that will be even more difficult where relationships are concerned. You can use this period to take further abuse from him or you can use this period to get out on your own with your children and start a new life. Neither will be easy but the later will certainly lead to a better future for you and your children. Opportunities for you to meet someone else are apparent and I believe you should do just that. It will help you forget about your abusive partner. Your chart also indicates that you are not likely to be with just one partner throughout your life. There is also evidence in your chart that you do attract men who will try to control and confine you. I suggest that you have an astrological evaluation done prior to giving your heart to the next man you want to become intimate with. Build on friendship first and you?ll stand a better chance of developing a long lasting union. You are coming into a high cycle where work and money are concerned. I feel confident that if you put your energy into your work, your children, your new home and meeting new friends and lovers you will find that your life will unfold quite nicely as we go into the year 2001. It sometimes helps to make a list of all the reasons that you feel that you should not be with your ex. Like the things he brings out in you that you don?t like and the things he does that you can?t live with. Every time he tries to contact you or you want to contact him pull out your list and read it just to remind yourself why you left him.
Eugenia
Dear Eugenia Last
In Nov of 2000 my son (born April 16, 1984 at 4:10 p.m.) developed a serious mental disease. This has been particularly hard on my younger son (born June 30, 1986 at 12:07 a.m.) and he has decided not to come home anymore because he is treated so poorly by his brother. At the same time my husband, born August 4,1950, has coped with this by staying a work most of his waking hours. To add to the mess he has an employee that he thinks is just perfect and she has been wiggling and giggling her way into our lives for nine years. I have repeatedly asked him to get her out of our lives but he refuses to do so. Since my son's illness started I have been the stay at home mom, nurse, whatever. As well as dealing with my son I also took care of my dad in his last year. He was very sick for a very long time and he had a mitt-full of health issues that made his passing very slow and painful. I have reached a point where all I feel is pain and I am trying to find some way to change my life. Do you have any suggestions - I was born August 24, 1950 at 6:50 PM.
Virgo
Dear Virgo
Lets address your relationship with your husband first. You neglected to mention the birth date of his wiggly giggly gal at the office leaving me nothing to work with regarding what's actually going on between them. I can tell you however that last year he was in a cycle that is conducive to having an affair and that he was born with the major sign of sorrow in his chart when it comes to relationships. He does not deal with health issues very well so God forbid he ever get ill himself. He has turned a blind eye on his family when you and your boys needed him the most. This is not the sign of a very strong man or partner and you should seriously consider what you are going to do about your marriage should he not agree to go to counseling to fix the problems you are experiencing. Somehow I don't think he will but you have to ask. With transiting Saturn still moving through an area of his chart that deals with his attitude toward his partner I'd say he is closed to any ideas that suggest fixing what's wrong and is probably in denial because it is the easy way out.
You on the other hand have been a glutton for punishment and you have to put an end to it before you become ill. Being a Virgo it is hard to give in to failure and move on but sometimes it's the only means of survival. The area of your chart that deals with partnerships, marriage etc has been and will continue to go through a make it or break it period so if you don't seek help it is likely to go downhill. You are actually however in a high cycle regarding love this year with transiting Jupiter favorably aspecting your natal Venus however it is not likely that you will get the chance to take advantage of this unless you opt to kick your husband out immediately and move on. It can however help you should you be able to convince your husband to seek help and counseling. Both you and your husband are heading into your second Saturn return during the second half of next year. This is a period of reevaluating your life and making choices that will alter your future. If you both haven't already been thinking along these lines already you will be soon. This period of time will be conducive to making the effort to do something about your relationship or move on. You both went through your first Saturn return in 1979 - if you think back to that time and what you were experiencing it will help you to make the right decision now.
Your sons are a completely different story. There is no excuse for your son with mental disorders to abuse his younger brother and you and your husband should never have let this happen. Your younger son is a Cancer and family means a lot to him. Fortunately he is coming into better times right now and I believe if he can manage to move on he will do just fine however he may
