We've all experienced times of conflict and personal struggle. Times when the assistance and advice of a friend always seemed to lend comfort and ease the burden. Have you ever wondered what it would be like if that friend was one of the world's most revered astrologers, with over 25 years of experience?
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I have decided to put more time and energy into my research. It’s been a pleasure to answer your emails and to help you through some of life’s tough journeys. Everyone who has participated in my Dear Eugenia column has enriched my life and I hope I have improved yours as well.
For those of you who wish to contribute birth data to my research, please enter your information to my medical astrology research listed on my home page. This research is explicitly dealing with cancer and mental health – addiction illness. The focus is on early diagnosis and preventative medicine.
I want to stress how important it is to submit complete and accurate birth data – the time and place of birth.
The following are our 'Dear Eugenia' letters archive:
Dear Eugenia
I had written to you a while back and I totally understand that you are overloaded with emails daily. I will try to keep this brief.
I'm completely tired and fed up with the dating game. Dating has become so difficult even with all the Internet sites to help us out. I find that so many people portray themselves a certain way that's practically "wonderful" for the most part and yet, within days or maybe even a short couple of weeks they show their "true selves". The guy that doesn't call back or doesn't make plans any more. I find it difficult to get past a 1st or 2nd date with many of these guys. I certainly don't think I'm an unattractive woman by any means, but I'm also a big-hearted person with a lot of genuine love. I just don't understand why it's so hard to find someone that I am not only physically attracted to, but emotionally as well. The men that I am attracted to for various reasons (humorous, cute, nice) turn out to be jerks! They show interest initially and then disappear! I'm pretty clear on the type of person that I am and that I am looking for, so I can't imagine these guys thinking I'm "that type of girl".
Eugenia, please shed some light here and tell me. Do you see love in my life SOON?
Last year I wrote to you and you said that I would meet someone in the latter part of 2006. Unfortunately, that didn't happen.
Is there any hope for me yet? When do you think I will meet the right man? I've been alone and have enjoyed it, but it's time to move forward in my life. I do hope to be married one day and have a family. (Whether biological children or adopted).
My DOB is 19/01/70 at 1 am.
Signed,
Tired yet still hopeful
Dear tired yet still hopeful
Yes indeed you did go through a very fast but short-lived love cycle late last year and you probably met a few people but nothing stuck. It wasn't the strongest transit but none the less one that had potential to lead to romance. It falls in an area of your chart that deals with meeting people through friends, neighbors, and relatives as well as by getting involved in activities with groups or pursuing interests you enjoy. Like taking a course or going on a singles cruise. Although the Internet can be included as a way to meet partners it certainly shouldn't be your first choice. Internet dating can work for some but so many people abuse this service by using it as a dating game instead of being serious. Lots of unhappy married people sit for countless hours connecting with people on internet dating sites because they are lonely in the relationship they are in. Not having to be face to face with someone they can lie, cheat and live in whatever dream world they want to create. This is hurtful to the honest individual who is truly looking for a long-term connection. It is far better to get involved in activities you enjoy so that you meet someone who has similar interests. This way you get to build the friendship first and let love take its course naturally instead of the fast paced internet dating scene that has taken the planet by storm. I tend to think a lot of people consider Internet dating as virtual dating - not real - just play.
Back to your chart - there is no reason why you can't find love. Your natal Venus is nicely positioned in your chart however I do believe that with your natal Saturn being in an area of your chart that deals with relationships that you are prone to marrying later in life rather than earlier and that you are also conservative and quite picky when it comes to a partner and there is nothing wrong with that. Probably even more so why you don't belong in the Internet dating game but will do much better using old fashioned methods to find love.
Although this year isn't bad for love you also have to be careful which partner you pick and that whoever you choose doesn't cost you financially
Dear Eugenia,
I am writing to you about a family problem. My sister and I are the primary caretakers of our mother. My mother is disabled and has a variety of health problems. Her birthday is 8/30/1941 @ 4:30 p.m.
My problem is that ever since I was a young child we have had severe disagreements, fighting, etc. My birthday is 8/5/1975 @ 11:30 p.m. I try to be patient and understanding but our bad feelings have just grown worse with time. The pain and hurt is just getting to be too much. Please give me some advice on how I can deal with her more effectively and what I should keep in mind to have any kind of good relationship at all.
Thanx
Leo
Dear Leo
Although there is a small problem that shows up in your comparison that deals with honest communication regarding the way you both feel the overall picture doesn't appear to be that horrid. Yes you can argue and yes you are very different from one another but that doesn't mean that you can't get along. Your mother needs a bit of a wakeup call. She is a very strong Virgo and I believe that she can be a perfectionist. If that is the case nothing you ever do will be good enough or right. You must sit her down and tell her that you cannot live with or under those conditions. That you are trying to help her and if she won't allow you the decency to carry on as you please that you and your sister will have to find someone else to take care of her. Your mother is going through a very debilitating period over the course of the next two years and I believe that she is severely depressed. She recently experienced her second Saturn return and I believe that she has reevaluated her life and has decided that she isn't too happy with the way it unfolded. The fact that she is lashing out at you because of her own regrets is a shame but she is your mother and what she needs is honesty, love and to be put in her place.
Eugenia
Dear Eugenia,
I am going through a breakup in my marriage of 15 years. It has been a very rocky marriage with control and mistrust on my part, and dishonesty and no loyalty on her part, and we haven't been friends in a long time, to name the most major problems. We were in turmoil for 4 weeks before we had an argument and then have been separated for 5 weeks now and have really had some nasty times. Some of the things she has said are very hurtful, and I don't know what is true and what is not. I think that most men would not stick around to hear the things she has been saying, but for some reason I can't seem to stop loving her and wanting her to come back to build on what we have or had. I have heard that she hasn't been in love with me in years- she was just "settling" or "getting by". I do now recognize some signs of her feeling this way, but I have a hard time seeing it being as much as she says. When we weren't mad at each other, there was always holding hands, cuddling, kissing, that type thing that after 15 years a lot of partners don't do as much as we did. I have really come to the realization that my mistrust and controlling manners have to change no matter what- and we're very misplaced with her. Basically, I realize that she came home to me every night, and now she doesn't- that's all that matters to me now. She wants some space to figure out who she is and has sometimes said things that give me hope (false hope is how she words it). She has also said several times that it is over and she just wants to move on. I can't seem to get my head into "moving on" as every one tells me to. I also can't seem to leave her alone and give her space. I am obsessed with trying to talk to her to start becoming friends- but it just makes her angrier and turns into a nasty fight sometimes. I don't know how to control my urge to not leave her alone because my whole life seems to be just falling apart without her beside me.
Can you guide me into a more secure or comfortable place?
Sorry I don't know the time of her or my birth. Her day was May 2/60 and mine is Sept. 11/66.
Virgo
Dear Virgo
The comparison does indicate trouble. There is a lack of trust and communication along with deception and anger. Uncertainty will always be a problem between the two of you regardless of whether you stay together or not. You need to let go. You have a good chart and if you can only realize that you were totally mismatched regarding your values and hers you might be able to move on. You match up to people born under the signs Taurus (not her - I'll explain later), Cancer, Virgo, Scorpio, Capricorn and Pisces. She may be a Taurus but only by Sun sign. She has her natal Mercury and Venus in the sign Aries and this sign does not match up to you at all. Mercury and Venus represent the way she thinks and communicates along with her morals, ethics and Venus represent the way she loves etc. What actually drew you together was the fact that you both have your Moon in the sign Cancer but that isn't enough to make a relationship work. She is erratic and can change her mind very rapidly. She wants to have fun and she needs freedom to come and go as she pleases. You need companionship, trust and someone who wants to be with you all the time. This connection just won't work that way. We are who we are and as much as either one of you may want to change I fear that the same problems will continually surface. You are headed toward lots of changes and you have to wrap your head around that and accept the inevitable. Should she even entertain the thought of getting back together it wouldn't be long before she would want to move on again. Let go and start anew. I believe that she has decided to do just that. The only time I see a possible reconciliation is this fall however as I mentioned before - should you get back together it would only be for a short period of time be
